Erin Faith Allen

Teesha and Flora and Madelyn and Orly! Oh My!

2012-01-17T09:48:00.000-08:00

Remember way back when, when I posted this interview with Teesha Moore? THE Teesha Moore?

While we were conducting the interview, Teesha and I began to chat about the possibilities of her bringing her beautiful self over to England to teach.

And guess what?

Teesha is coming to England to teach!

And guess what else?

She is joined by the glorious Flora Bowley, the effervescent Madelyn Mulvaney, and the sweet spirit of Orly Avineri.

YES. It's true. One art retreat. Four super gloriously wild women, and YOU.

It's a mega-watt lineup in an enchanted location ... and registration is OPEN. The Universe is smiling upon England, fo sho.

Join us! Come into the Wild with us ....

Read all about the exciting details of this life-changing sacred-celebrating experience here.

Solstice Fire, Transformation, and Amazingness

2012-01-10T07:50:00.000-08:00

In the next few days I'll be announcing Something Beautiful.

In the process of creating this Something, I've been steeped in a sweet deepening. This is how visions, transitions, and expansion happen for me: I get quiet. Move slowly. I think, and I feel. At my own pace, in my own way, on my own terms ... yet somehow on the terms of the benevolent Universal flow of expansiveness ... and therein lies my support, information, and comfort. It's all delicately interwoven, you see.

You know that experience, right?

And do you also know these questions?

What do I need to release? What do I need to become? What is trying to emerge? What is inside me that I can give to the world? What is inside me that exists purely to be given? What shifting needs to occur within me, so that I can give that pure and soulful version of myself to the world? What do I need to release?

These are not small questions, and the moment you ask them ... something happens. The answers arrive, and they gently ply you open and you want nothing more than to take them in and live them. Nothing else matters.

And everything everything depends on how you sit with the questions, and allow the answers to rearrange your life.

Leading up to the solstice, I spent a good deal of time doing some good old fashioned self-archaeology. I dug through the ancient history of me. I asked the questions. And then, I began to write down alllll the answers, including the qualities, thoughts, patterns, behaviors and viewpoints I felt ready to release so that I could create - in the highest state of surrender to being the change I want to see in the world - this Something Beautiful that was making itself known to me.

12 pages. TWELVE. That's how much baggage made itself known to me. How did that feel? Kinda like 'omg that is a crapload of shiz I've been carrying around!' and 'I'm over it!' and 'wow, I am a survivor'.

As I wrote down each releasing, it slipped off my shoulders and loosened it's grip on my psyche.

On the Solstice, I burned it all.

Yep. Just like that, threw it into the fire of transformation, released it. Poof. Over the heat of the fire, as I felt the weight of shame and fear and smallness turn to ash, I felt the lightness of possibility take a deep breath of relief. That lightness began to make sound; it whispered that all sorts of amazingness would now rise up through me where I was cloggy with stuff that was holding me back. Was I ready? Yep. Can I surrender? Yes. Okay, that's it. Amazingness, rise up!

Guess what? It is. Amazingness. Rising up. Flowing through. The best part is recognizing that I am purely the vehicle for the amazingness. My only role is to match the amazingness with my thoughts, purity of heart, and actions, so that we can be compatible collaborators. The gratitude I feel about being a part of the Something Beautiful is just so big that it actually carries me around, informs me, inspires me, and propels me into action. My brain is the organizing conduit, my heart is kinda like the nerve center feeling it's way through it all, sending signals. When I'm on the right track my heart gives me a green light and a pat on the butt ... go, yes .... that's right, go!

In 2012, it's all about feeling my way through Big Beautiful Things, small somethings and everything. I'm not thinking them through via filters of my past: what I was 'taught' I should be/am/was, or my own history sludging up my vision. Not anymore. It's all just ash.

My heart, my beautiful pulsing vital organ, knows the answers because it is connected directly to my soul. And my soul is my guru, my teacher, my goddess, my eternal phoenix rising up in a flame of truth and transformation.

Yep. My soul is eternal. So is yours.

(Special gratitude to Pixie Campbell, whose work inspired this ritual of releasing. You are beautiful, Pixie.)

Exploring (Feeling) the Holy Land . Part I

2011-12-11T02:26:00.001-08:00

I went to Jerusalem believing it would change my life.

It did.

Every stitch and fiber of my being has always wanted to visit the land of Jesus. I discovered Jesus when I was a very small child of 3 or 4. Hopping onto the bus to church on Sunday mornings all by myself, off I would go to my Sunday School storyland of the benevolent soul Jesus Christ. He loved everybody. He healed everybody. And he fed everybody. I loved him, I could sense his energy and his golden halo. I clung to it. My little life had lots of dark corners in it, but Jesus was something bright and strong that I could hold onto. They told me he would save me from my sins, and I believed that he would. He was just the kind of person who would do something like that.

jerusalem as seen from the Mt of Olives

A few years later, one of the members of my church in Northern California returned from a trip to 'the Holy Land' as it was called in our circles, and held a show and tell service, complete with a slide show of images documenting their places of pilgrimage.

Imagine me, seven or eight years old, sitting in the front row, my feet dangling off the edge of the pew. Long long hair, curious eyeballs and heart, and a longing to be close to the purity of Jesus. There, in front of me, on a larger than life slideshow screen on my church's platform, the photos played out. One after another. Click. Click. Click. I can still hear the sound of the slide projector as it moved each image through it's circular tray, flooding each transparent slide with light.

That was the first time I realized there was a whole other world out there. And that this energy of love and protection that Jesus was to me was actually represented on Earth, in that world out there. He actually walked in those places, he sat, and ate and breathed and laughed.

The Jesus I knew laughed a lot, head thrown back, eyes sparkling with corners crinkled. He had gentle calloused hands, and his voice was husky. His cause was the underdog. He wanted everyone to feel worthy, to know themselves as love incarnate, and to stand up for themselves.

I wanted to go there, where he walked; where his feet, covered in dust, connected step by step with the land. Surely the land holds that memory sacred, then. If I could just go there, and touch that land, the land would release it's memories into me. I just knew it.

Jesus loved all kinds of people no matter what they did, and they loved him back. He died, too. I was very aware of his death. I have very visceral memories of my whole body sobbing more than once over the tragedy. It was just too much for me to handle. Jesus was my friend, my protector, my light. I took him seriously. After all, in those long nights when the corners were especially dark, he showed up and held my hand. That's how I know what his hands are like.

The Jewish tradition believes that when the Messiah comes he will walk triumphantly through this section of Jerusalem, and so this has become their preferred burial ground.

When I grew up and left home, I began to seek the truth about the origins of religions. I read book after book about the conception of the Christian faith. The Jesus I knew didn't quite fit into what I had always been taught, anyway. I still see his character just as I always did ... I also have an education about the origin of the Christianization of the world.

That is the backstory to my lifelong desire to go to Israel. When the trip was finally booked just a few months ago, I took a deep breath and did a happy dance. Aware of my expectations, I knew that this trip would be a major homecoming for me. A part of me already knows Israel; deeeeep inside I feel a cellular synergy and recognition of the land.

All that stuff about peace and war and bombs and stealing land and killing? Never once did I believe that would get in the way of my connection to the land. I totally believed the land Jesus walked would still hold his footsteps, his very heartbeat, and would sing them to me.

That's what the earth does. It sings to me.

So, I arrived in Israel. Heart wide open. Excited. My inner little-girl-who-freakin-loves-Jesus was pretty excited too. My camera was ready: oh my, the photos I would take.

The ornate ceiling over the top of Golgotha, rock of Calvary, inside the Church of the Holy Sepulchre. This church reportedly contains the burial and crucifixion areas of Jesus - including the tomb from which he rose after 3 days of death.

I went to Golgotha. Or rather, the spot that someone in the 4th century claimed was Golgotha. It is now a gargantuan church. I stood in line amidst the trembling pilgrims, and touched the very rock upon which they believe Jesus was crucified. I then queued for the entrance into the tomb of Jesus. When I was inside, the priest/guard continuously smacked the wall of Jesus' tomb, 'Hurry up! Let's go! Keep moving!'.

The video below shows the tomb, on the left side of the frame. It's a bit wobbly, and you may want to brace yourself for the mega blast of organ music.

I went to Bethlehem, in the West Bank, just a ten minute bus ride from Jerusalem. Bethlehem is now surrounded by tour buses and olive wood factories. Oh, and a really big wall with barbed wire, video cameras, and one way mirror watchtowers. And people with guns. You have to go through the gutwrenching process of the Israeli checkpoint before you can cross in or out of Bethlehem, which sits on the other side of the graffiti-sprayed security wall built to separate Palestine and Israel. A thick tension uncomfortably permeates the atmosphere. As if a hand were clamped over your mouth and you can still breathe, but your breath is limited and you know you are at the mercy of the hand.

The Church of the Nativity, where they say Jesus was born in a manger, is a cab ride away from the wall. The Church of Nativity itself is owned by two separate religious sects, who are quite well-known for their fist-fights with each other over who is the REAL owner of the site.

I got yelled at by a priest there, just a few yards away from the manger, for sitting with my legs crossed. (Floor-length long skirt fully covering the female temptress regions of legsanklestoes, arms covered too). Until that moment, I was unaware of the unholiness of that seated position. But fist-fights are holy obviously.

Back in Jerusalem, I walked the Via Dolorosa, the narrow route on which Jesus carried the cross on the way to crucifixion. I went to the Garden of Gethsemane. I stood on the spot where Jesus was beaten and scorned. I tried really hard to get to the Temple Mount, to visit the ultimate holy site for all 3 major religions, but was repeatedly turned away for not appearing to be Jewish, Muslim, or arriving at the proper time (closing time is apparently not the REAL closing time if you are me.)

I watched with intense curiosity as at least a thousand Jews celebrated Shabbat at the Wall; I felt their inherent sense of belonging to one another, the rich heritage that runs through their veins, the land upon which they danced, and their God. The energy created by their righteous conviction of belonging was spine-tingling, invigorating, awe-inducing.

I listened to the Call to Prayer as the sun set over Jerusalem. The haunting devotion of the Muslim prayers activated a primal ache inside of me. Standing on the ramparts of the walls, removed from the layers where history and present-tense converge, the cascading sounds of multiple prayer calls woven over the waning, pinkish light of the sky is sheer beauty.

The passions contained within the walls of the Old City are like a maniacally throbbing heartbeat; fed from 3 isolated veins, ever-escalating and kaleidoscoping out in a myriad of beliefs --- with a frenetic fervor that is all at once mesmerizing and bonechilling.

Do you know what? I could write an entire book about my time in Israel. The Dead Sea, the Sea of Galilee, Tel Aviv, Jerusalem, the West Bank, Haifa ... addd a quick jaunt over the border into Jordan and Petra for the icing on the cake ... and you've got a girl with a hell of a lot to say, who can double her words with pictures.

Jerusalem gets inside of you. There is something about it ... something that wakes you up and shatters you to smithereens all at the same time. It is polarizing, smothering, intoxicating, maddening, overwhelming, and completely beyond definition. Even though I keep trying. As if defining it will help heal the questions and aches that Jerusalem birthed in me.

(You can read a little more about that here)

I've said enough for now. And for the first time in my life, I feel my photographs don't quite tell the whole story. Maybe just because it all just feels so big over there.

Eyes That Can See In the Dark

2011-11-29T06:09:00.001-08:00

This is a drawing that popped out this morning while I was writing.

I am feeling the strength of holding the balance between dualities.

Of being everything all at once.

Of plunging into deep spaces

and oh thank heavens having the courage to rise up

when a part of me wants to wobble and crawl.

I stare at my reflection, the world-out-there, and everything in between

with eyes that can see in the dark.

Pouring Hearts, Banksy, and Israel

2011-11-23T00:20:00.001-08:00

I took this photo in Bethlehem. You know, where Jesus was born. Which is now tucked behind a towering wall decked out with watchtowers and electric barbed wire, built to separate Palestine and Israel. Jerusalem is just a few miles away, on the other side of the wall.

Our Palestinian tour guide told me that this particular piece of graffiti was gifted to the Palestinians from Banksy, when he visited a few years back.

For those of you who check in regularly with my blog, you may have noticed I've gone quiet.

My journey to Israel threw me into a tailspin. Shattered my belief system. Spawned a billion questions and an equal number of heartaches, opinions, and righteous indignation regarding the state of the world. My faith? Completely eviscerated.

These are topics you are not supposed to speak about, really. Especially if you consider yourself to be a spiritual human being, with a mission to help heal the world by being a very very good person filled with endless love, light, and compassion.

It's only been two months since Israel, but it feels like years. I cannot shake the depths that opened in me. I'd like to come out of hiding now; to share, speak and heal my heart.

The angel in the piece above, is acknowledging the stark reality of the world it is looking down upon. That's pretty clear from the look on it's benevolent face. It is pouring love, colorful and steady, down in the direction of it's gaze. If you look at body language, it is even leaning it's 'physical' nature down, giving it's full attention to what is occurring.

I'd like to think I've become a bit like that angel after my trip. I see the state of things planet-wide, (not just in the Middle East - 'They' aren't the only ones with issues). And oh boy, do I feel it.

Bigtime.

It's one thing to see it on the news, or adopt your culture's point of view.

It's another to see it, in sweeping panoramic context .... and to FEEL it. Up close. Eyes wide open.

I just can't ignore it, nor use my spiritual beliefs to pretend that people aren't suffering, that there isn't a rather large imbalance happening on our planet, and plenty of people being hurt in the process. What I can do is look it square in the eyes with my own blazing eyeballs, and navigate through compassion while acknowledging the horrors I'd rather not know about ...

AND do the things my heart and my physical action are drawn to DO about it ... like pour hearts out of my palms, or walk with my feet on the ground .... even if the ground my soles walk upon is roadmarked occasionally with destruction, dualism, fear, and incites a divinely righteous rage in me sometimes.

In this particular moment, what I am doing is writing this piece. About how I'm realizing that for me, spirituality doesn't mean take no action, or don't think about 'negative' things, or simply visualize a better world and it will eventually spring into being, and that if I avoid placing my attention on things like war, killing, and protests they will go away.

Spirituality means being the comfort in a crazy world. A voice of compassion in chaos. You kinda have to be in the crazy and chaos sometimes in order to have a calming compassionate effect.

I'm still sorting it all out for myself. All I know is that my heart opened up wide in Israel, wide enough to swallow up all the heartache, anger, fear, terrorizing, and history that slice of the planet has been regurgitating for thousands of years.

And it's made me see differently. That's all I know right now. And I'm okay with that.

2011-11-13T00:17:00.001-08:00

Graphic by Unknown Artist

We were made for these times.

One of the most calming and powerful actions you can do to intervene in a stormy world is to stand up and show your soul. Soul on deck shines like gold in dark times. The light of the soul throws sparks, can send up flares, builds signal fires, causes proper matters to catch fire. To display the lantern of soul in shadowy times like these - to be fierce and to show m...ercy toward others, both, are acts of immense bravery and greatest necessity. Struggling souls catch light from other souls who are fully lit and willing to show it. If you would help to calm the tumult, this is one of the strongest things you can do.

There will always be times when you feel discouraged. I too have felt despair many times in my life, but I do not keep a chair for it; I will not entertain it. It is not allowed to eat from my plate. The reason is this: In my uttermost bones I know something, as do you. It is that there can be no despair when you remember why you came to Earth, who you serve, and who sent you here. The good words we say and the good deeds we do are not ours: They are the words and deeds of the One who brought us here. In that spirit, I hope you will write this on your wall: When a great ship is in harbor and moored, it is safe, there can be no doubt. But that is not what great ships are built for.

This comes with much love and prayer that you remember who you came from, and why you came to this beautiful, needful Earth.

Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph.D

Graphic by Unknown Artist

Spontaneous Stream of Consciousness from A Woman

2011-10-17T05:43:00.000-07:00

self portrait. glastonbury. path to the tor.

This is how I feel right now:

I feel very female

All woman

All fiery vulnerable roar

An inferno of wisdom

A nest of creation

A passageway of nature's floodgates

A place where thunderstorms rage

And tears pour

Down from above

And into from beyond

Spilling out from infinity within.

I am woman

I am temple

I am everything powerful that exists.

I spin

I dance

I howl

I shriek

I love

I embrace

I nurture

I question

I heal

I feel

I ravage

I burn

I am.

The sun spills my rays

The moon mirrors my gaze.

I am woman.

Child.

Crone.

Out of time

All at once

Light and shadow

Whirlpool and stillpool

No reason no rhyme.

Uncategorizable unprogrammable

Wholly holy

Primal organic shine.

A gushing space of love, sweet love

and essence of wild

delicate

courage

and

living light divine.

How To Be You

2011-10-10T00:11:00.000-07:00

Where are you today?

Where is your attention?

Where have you placed your focus?

Are your thoughts projected somewhere out there, on someone or something you can't control

even though you are reaaaaaalllly reaaaalllllly trying to believe in the illusion that you can?

Have you stopped recently in the middle of all the busy-ness that fills your days

And asked yourself

REALLY asked yourself from the truthful heart space within:

What matters to me?

Where are my thoughts?

Am I in the past or the future?

What about the NOW?

Have I smiled today?

Have I shared kindness today?

Have I believed in GOOD today?

Have I acted consciously .... and not reacted unconsciously or subconsciously?

Have I loved myself today?

If you stop

and ask yourself any of those questions

you will find some gorgeous, glorious truthful treasures

that will make your day

PERFECT. HAPPY. MIRACULOUS.

And overflowing with the gushing river of the purest potential and soulful expression

that can ONLY come from YOU.

Cauldron of the Purity of Soul

2011-10-04T03:05:00.000-07:00

October.

This time of year is always a symphonic recipe of feelings for me. The light of day wanes and pulls melancholy into a tangible brew. The nights and shadows grow longer, and there comes into my consciousness a silent banshee wail that feeds my creative fire. The studio beckons, and there is a hungry ache of endless visual and textual streams vying for my attention. There is a need to hunker down, to stay warm, to embrace the dawning of winter. I feel the grief of summer's end deeply, the shift of light and shadow feels like nails on chalkboard in my soul.

This October I feel a churning that goes much deeper than just ordinary autumn. It is a wide-flung recipe of bubbling up, a potpourri of microcosms and paradigms boiling over.

This October there is so much global change, so much stirring of hearts and souls. In this global mish-mash we can perceive a boiling over of chaos .... OR we can see truth revealing itself in a myriad of ways as we watch the world move up and out in new directions. Everyone, it seems, is going through something. A big move, a health challenge, a financial stress, endings and beginnings in relationship, etc; it seems there is a deep polarization occurring .... one that is a simultaneous call to unity.

The fire that burns beneath this cauldron of global change is The Soul ...

The Global Soul, the Cultural Soul, the Community Soul, the Individual Soul.

It's all the same thing.

The Soul is innately pure; and knows only creation, love, and the truest truth of truths:

That change is coming. And we are making it happen.

Because individually ~ and therefore collectively ~ our soul / consciousness is crying out for it's own purity to be heard, expressed, manifested, revealed, and lived.

This can be felt in a different way for everyone: a longing to move to a new location, an urge to create, a need to make a difference, a sense that there is something more to life than 9-5ing it, a growing discontent over the current structures that hold sway in our lives, the realization that you are indeed responsible for the manifestation of your own experiences, a pull toward self-development ie reading books and taking classes, seeking your tribe of like-minded souls, a willingness to speak up and do something about the imbalance of wealth and power in our societies, an emerging expansion of the definition of power, and most of all ... the complete and total acceptance that existence in it's purest form comes from knowing who you are and being your own boss of your life :)

Ultimately, you are recognizing that YOU are the power.

And that TRUE power is only sustainable when it is pure and seeks harmony.

My soul? It's your soul too. We're in this together, this intensity of planetary cauldron. Oh sure, I get a little wound up from time to time, I feel worried, I feel rage. I get gobbled up in the landslide of duality consciousness and finger pointing. But I always come back to the purity, the sweetness, the peace that is the core of my Soul ... OUR Soul ... our collective growth-impulse that wants better and believes we deserve more.

Remember this: that underneath it all, when it appears light is fading and shadows are growing longer, underneath the evening autumn news headlines harbinging doom and gloom ...

Purity of Soul is our birthright. It is the ultimate gift of being human. In these times let us pour our attention, with levity and reverence, to the call of our Souls. We are the necessary ingredients.

Individually AND collectively we are the cook, the kitchen, the cauldron, and the fire.

i've got peace on my mind.

2011-10-02T23:29:00.000-07:00

sea of galilee, perfect peace in israel, sept of 2011.

Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.

~ Albert Einstein

Paris Snaphots

2011-09-20T01:20:00.000-07:00

A few snapshots from my recent rendezvous in Paris :)

overflowing with beingness

2011-09-15T02:00:00.000-07:00

Life is overflowing with goodness ...

(love, laughter, travel, impending autumn, internal season shifting, hellos and goodbyes)

My creative output has been in a placid lull

as I am

Practicing being in the moment ...

Recognizing deep in my cells

really getting it for the first time

that life is about BEING, not about DOING.

Dropped into deep gratitude for WHAT IS ....

instead of spinning dizzily in a pile of to-do's, plans, goals, if-i-could-only-(blank)-then-i-will-finally-be-that-perfect-person-i-expect-myself-to-be....

I am just here.

Me.

(hello everyone, it's me!!!)

ahhhh .... sweet relief ... i breathe in

the freedom from the harsh expectations i put upon myself

Relishing and ravishing the joys, the gifts, the unbelievable waves of love.

no more chasing that elusive somebody i should be that is never quite good enough for me

I am here to BE me, to fully embody my life minute by exquisite minute.

chilled out, strong, que sera sera whatever will be will be ....

or trying anyway ... i am human and get pissed off, tired ...

it seems i'm always seeking balance

between peace and doormat.

Gobbling up the goodness that surrounds me

in the perfect moments

I create

asking for the wisdom, cultivating the presence to BE the full spectrum of ultimate creator

of art, of words, of actions, thoughts, deeds, friendship, of LIFE

by just being

inside every breath, encounter, experience, integration ...

every moment that is a pure and complete reflection of me.

Everything is Blooming ....

2011-08-28T23:49:00.000-07:00

self portrait, at the foot of the Tor, Glastonbury, August 2011.

Everything is blooming most recklessly;

if it were voices instead of colors,

there would be an unbelievable shrieking into the heart of the night.

~ Rilke

self portrait, at the foot of the Tor, Glastonbury, August 2011.

A Little Vacay from Blogland

2011-08-25T00:24:00.000-07:00

How are you doing?

Me? I am in a dizzying, accelerated, swooshy up-down-all-around of sheer goodness.

Lots of travel, big events, foundation-building plans and structuring.

ALL GOOD! And very all-consuming.

I have loads of photos to upload, loads of good news to shout from the mountaintops, loads of luscious goodies to share ....

And will return in mid September to spill all!

How are YOU?

My workshops for Art, Heart, Soul ~ at Artfest 2012

2011-08-03T01:37:00.000-07:00

The Artfest 2012 website is up and running! I am so excited to be teaching mixed media workshops this year; making new friends ... and making art while making new friends! Does it get any better than that? I'm teaching three different classes, all designed for any type of artist, and any level of skill, and are designed to enhance creativity and accelerate personal evolution:

1) Visual Memoir with Photos

2) Soul Portrait Empowerment

3) Under Your Skin

As an artist and energy intuitive I have combined my passion for soul-growth with my other passion: full-blown, no-holding-back creative expression. Nothing is more magical than cultivating deep connection with our soul spark. And to create from that space? That is what my workshops are all about: The pure magic of embodying soul in the creative process results in vibrantly energetic art, and an invigorating sense of self .... for one holistically empowered, radiant artmaking soul!

What kind of magic will we be making?

Below is a sampling of my work, course description, and the type of creative processes I will be sharing with my students.

A sample 'Visual Memoir with Photos' image:

......................................................

A sample 'Soul Portrait Empowerment' image:

..........................................

A sample 'Under Your Skin' image:

I hope to see your smiling face there!!!!

To register, or if you have any questions about the extremely amazing experience also known as Artfest, please visit the Artfest website.

Alternatively, you can email me with questions about my workshops :)

Go forth and shine, and don't forget to breathe occasionally.

2011-07-25T05:27:00.000-07:00

image © erinfaithallen

My world is a big fat shiny blur right now. Here's why:

1) Planning a wedding - it's 5 weeks away!

2) Booking mixed media Art, Heart, Soul Workshops around the world for 2012-2013. Interested? Sign up to receive updates and scheduling (and freeeeee stuff!) on the top right of my sidebar.

3) Making TWO books - one photo book of my travels, and one mixed media visual memoir a la Erin.

4) Launching a photography business: local (UK) and destination weddings, maternity, engagement, event, baby, family etc etc etc. Doing FREE shoots until my portfolio is perfecto - know anyone who might be interested, who is also living in the UK? Have them contact me at erinallenphoto@gmail.com

5) Creating Meditation Mantra illustrations - most can be found in my new etsy shop here, and the rest on www.erinfaithallen.com, under Art--->Meditation Mantras. The image above is part of that family. I'll be adding the rest to Etsy soooooon.

6) Rethinking my whole entire self and what I have to offer the world. (you can imagine that is no small chore). The question 'Who Am I?' is large and in charge as I cleanse, clear and remodel my entire existence to reflect WHAT I WANT and WHO I AM and WHAT I HAVE TO GIVE every last person on the planet. Having mega realizations about parts of myself I've always been afraid to claim ... more to follow on that, most certainly.

8) Learning to build my own website. My self can't be contained on a hosting template any longer. Nor is it willing to tolerate bouncing between blog and website. Got to have one cozy umbrella to nestle all my appendages under. I'm just too multi-faceted for this world ;)

9) Oh, and I have a 9-5, too.

Yeah, I'm busy. What about YOU? What are you up to?

It feels like ....

2011-07-12T22:52:00.000-07:00

It feels like ....

The earth is spinning faster; she is dizzying, shimmy-shaking, and shapeshifting.

The sun is shining brighter, shooting off flares of imminent transformation.

The glow of the moon has a crone's whisper .... 'shine' .... she urges ....

'remember, you have to breathe deep in the dark to be the light.'

Our earth is singing opera, bellowing in low octaves;

And a siren's soprano, in full range of sound spirals that ping us to our core.

Spiraling, soaring, chasing stars.

Our watery oceans are churning in stillness. They undulate; a womb of salty creation.

The deserts are crackling dry, holy footprints sparking awakening on every stretch of earth.

The mountains themselves are returning to a heaving volcanic state.

Lava dancing, thumping with hallowed shamanic drumming.

And the stars? The stars are beaming like never before.

Watching. Transmitting.

Transmuting. Believing in us. Shining on us.

Nourishing starseeds with devotion; reflecting our joy as we rise to meet

orb of sun, balance of moon, and messengers of stars ...

and rise to meet ourselves for the first time.

With hearts and feet buried in the sparking earth, the roaring womb, the mountain gods ...

We breathe, we shine.

We cry streaming tears.

We sigh, we fall, we rise again.

Hearts rooted in Earth,

Souls reaching for stars.

That's us. That's who We Are.

A Day in Crop Circles!

2011-07-07T04:00:00.000-07:00

Who wouldn't snap up the chance to spend a day wandering through crop circles in England's Wiltshire countryside, surrounded by the Avebury stone circles, lots of cows, and a great group of friends?

My curiosity will always lead me to new adventures of the sacred and mystic kind, and I jumped at the opportunity to join the London Spirituality Meet Up day out, led by the beautiful Clare Russell of metaLife.

Let me begin by saying I held no opinion whatsoever of the origin of crop circles ... aliens? Great! Hoaxes? Great! High frequency vibrations that short out nearby electricity? Great! The joy I find in exploring the world and her sacred sites is ALL about feeling for myself what is true, using my intuitive and empathic abilities to suss it all out for myself.

I frequently use the designs in my artwork, (side note: check out my friend Diana's Crop Circle Clay for some gorgeous crop circle inspired pottery!) because I do hold the belief that sacred geometry is very powerful - and that's what crop circles are: sacred geometry emblazened in fields of wheat or barley in the countryside. How they arrive there I do not know, nor do I really care!

Sacred symbols in fields of green and gold? A win-win opportunity - aliens or no aliens. I leap at the chance to spend the day in the countryside with like minded folks who groove on nature and the magical possibilities of the Universe.

Rather than give a blow by blow description of each of the three circles, I'll post the picturers and give my full feeling-report at the end :) Our first stop was this circle, just a stones throw from Avebury:

(image source: crop circle connector)

On the approach into the center ....

Me! In a crop circle! In England!

Oh hello juicy earth energy with a tinge of celestial wonderfulness!

Off to the next circle ....

(image source: crop circle connector)

A pub sits just on the edge of the field holding the circle ...

And a there's a chalk horse carved into the hillside overlooking the circle ...

Making our way in through the narrow foot path ...

I'm pretty sure I could happily laze about in the middle of fields for the rest of my life :) The energy in the English countryside is always off the charts for me, and this was no exception.

After my meditation in the smallest circle out of the 8 in the design ...

Aaaaand our final field ...

(image source: crop circle connector)

The ascent up the hill ...

This circle was incredibly intricate and filled with little 'pods', all of which had people lying in them.

So fun! As you know by now, I'm always looking for an excuse to plop into a field.

I. Am. So. Happy. Standing in the middle of my alien pod :) Barefoot. Open to possibilities. Thinking with my heart. Breathing. Loving the earth. Loving the stars. Just loving, really.

So. What opinion do I have now that I've walked barefoot and meditated horizontally in three different crop circles?

I've heard many theories over the years, so I'm pretty aware of the stigma and opinions people have drawn around them. I can only understand these crop circles by how I FEEL when I'm in them, and what my empathic connection with the Earth tells me. So, I'm not really interested in trying to understand or explain them. But I do know what I felt ....

I'm very sure that a brain-type understanding of these symbols and their origins is NOT the way to approach them. I came to the circles with no expectations, and I left with incredible life-shifting experiences.

For me? It's clear that crop circles are a sacred kiss where earth meets sky. That there are multi-dimensional fields collaborating with our human collective consciousness. That the earth herself is as involved in this co-creation as the sky dimensions ~ and US, the humans, in our consciousness and evolution.

Kinda like a Holy Trinity of Earth, Sky and We.

(And don't forget to check out Diana's pottery at Crop Circle Clay!)

2011-07-05T02:06:00.000-07:00

I AM ...

these days it's all about just being.

just hanging out in the moment,

not future forecasting or dwelling on the past.

just being the I am that I am.

I find pure joy in the moment

in the I am

in the beingness of Now.

My life is beautiful

I am beautiful

and gratitude lays like a goop of frosting

over everything that I am.

All I need is here now

because

I AM all that I could ever need.

Now is the only sure thing.

I am the everything that is everywhere

and I am the You that is Me.

Port Meadow, Oxford and the MAGIC ♡

2011-06-30T02:10:00.000-07:00

I want to show you one of the most beautiful places in the world, a place I go to communicate deeply with the Earth and her stories, history, and messages. A place where my soul stirs, my heart opens, my connection to the vast beauty of this planet is effortlessly spilled open and potent beyond words. This is Port Meadow, in Oxford. Richly layered with history, the meadow opens herself and GIVES to anyone who enters.

The history of the meadow goes back a looooong time, and lays deeply marinating in never-plowed soil. A few tidbits: artifacts from an Iron Age settlement have been found there, also notable are Bronze Age round barrows, and it was used as a make-shift hospital for the incredibly brave British WWII soldiers.

My favorite bit of history is this: Lewis Carroll brought Alice and her sisters for picnics and boat rides down the river Thames through the meadow, and this is known to be the very place Alice in Wonderland was born. As they were rowing, Carroll began to make up the story that would later become the book we all adore.

Would it surprise you if I told you the trees are VERY alive here? I don't think any trees are just trees, but indeed there is something incredibly special about the trees in Port Meadow. They are grand, beautiful, and open; shimmy-shaking their leaves in excited greeting.

Did you know that Tolkien also lived here in Oxford? The Ents from Lord of the Rings were inspired by the trees in the woods just beyond Port Meadow. Let me tell you, the Ents are still alive and well in Oxfordshire, England!

And as you wander along the Thames (or the Isis, as it is called whilst meandering through Oxford) you will come to this crumbling stone ruin: Godstow Abbey.

Godstow was established in the 12th century. Aside from being the picnic grounds for Lewis Carroll and Alice, it is intrinsically tied to a fascinating chapter of English history. Rosamund the Fair was buried here after her turn as the mistress to King Henry II (husband to Eleanor of Acquitane, and father to Richard the Lionheart and the notoriously naughty King John).

According to Wikipedia: Henry and the Clifford family paid for her tomb at Godstow in the choir of the convent's church and for an endowment that would ensure care of the tomb by the nuns. It became a popular local shrine until 1191, two years after Henry's death. Hugh of Lincoln, Bishop of Lincoln, while visiting Godstow, noticed Rosamund's tomb right in front of the high altar. The tomb was laden with flowers and candles, demonstrating that the local people were still praying there. Unsurprisingly calling Rosamund a harlot, the bishop ordered her remains removed from the church: instead, she was to be buried outside the church 'with the rest, that the Christian religion may not grow into contempt, and that other women, warned by her example, may abstain from illicit and adulterous intercourse'.

And of course, the formidable King Henry VIII is the one responsible for destruction of the nunnery in 1539 when he rampaged through the country toppling churches.

When the wind picks up just a notch, and the sun dives behind the clouds ... if you squint your eyes just a tinge ... you can hear the laughter and whispers of the nuns, as well as the devotional chanting in the chapel above. It's the only building slightly in tact. There is plenty of history still in motion here, and it's ripe and ready for anyone who visits.

I've done a bit of research on Godstow, and have also read that the nuns here were particularly predisposed to un-chaste behavior. According to some, this was known as a favorite destination for the local monks, ifyouknowwhatimean.

Though the nunnery is pretty desolate these days; let me tell you the energy there is ANYTHING but. The hairs on the top of my head prickle when I walk into the ruins. There is a very high level of residual energy here, meaning that history kinda keeps on looping in an 'unseen' sort of way. There is a mixture of very sacred and very sinister energy culminating on these grounds ... and I LOVE it :)

Just outside the walls of the nunnery, is this clearing guarded by two loyal trees. I love this clearing. It is flooded with high vibed earth energy. My usual Godstow trek involves taking a little spin complete with hair-on-end and skin prickles through the ruins, then walking through the walls in the photo above, which brings me to the view below. Then I walk through the two trees, into the clearing, and plop.

See what I mean? Pristine. I love this. I've been known to take many a nap on this blanket of buttercups. Time absolutely disappears here, and all sorts of magic happens.

After a couple years of doing my little pilgrimages into Port Meadow, I'm preeeettttttttyyyy sure that Lewis Carroll and JRR Tolkien weren't just kooky guys with vivid imaginations.

By the way, CS Lewis also lived here, and wrote The Narnia books here. Hmmmm. Oh, and Phillip Pullman? He lives in Oxford too. The Golden Compass? Written in Oxford. See what I mean?

Oxford is puuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrre magic. I'm convinced there is some sort of portal / vortex / leyline / SOMETHING of a massively creative nature here, because my soul blooms and spins like crazy in the town of Oxford and the meadow. My soul doesn't lie! And obviously I'm in pretty good company, what with the quadruple hit of mega-magical authors who've been deeply inspired by this historical town in The Shire. :)

Just breathe ♡

2011-06-28T01:20:00.000-07:00

breathe © erin faith allen

The energies of earth and sky

and everything in between

are I N T E N S E right now.

Everything is accelerating and exacerbating.

Everything rushing toward great change

with wild passionate abandon.

Cells are multiplying in organized creative frenzy.

Rivers of ecstatic possibility run through our veins.

Our brains are fire, crackling with heat of brightest light.

Do you feel it?

Just breathe.

Just hold yourself tight and breathe.

One deep breath at a time ...

And feel your nervous system cool, melt, soften, and smile.

Feel your heart open, expand, and take over ...

When our world amps up, and intensity flares

Remember you have the choice

To just breathe ...

Float ...

Be the kindness, heart, the soothing elixir ...

A compassionate sedative

For your self,

for a world in flux.

Be the change,

Be the love,

Be the deeeeep deeeeeep breath.

I'm Teaching at Artfest 2012 ♡

2011-06-24T05:35:00.000-07:00

2012 ALREADY ROCKS!!!!!!!!

I am very excited to announce that I will be teaching 3 mixed media workshops at Artfest in Washington State on March 28-April 1st, 2012. This is also the 12th anniversary of Artfest, which is lovingly facilitated by the mega-talented Teesha Moore (you can read more about that here) and her equally gifted husband Tracy. For many many moons I have wanted to attend this artmaking creativity churning festival of celebration, and as it turns out I'll make my Artfest debut by TEACHING :) (By my love, the Pacific Ocean ... SWOON!)

The Artfest site goes live August 1st.

Registration begins September 3rd.

Classes are at 80% capacity within days of registration, so let the countdown begin .... mark your calendar .... and REGISTER, because I want to see your shiny souls, face to face!!!

MY WORKSHOPS:

Soul Portrait Empowerment

In this soul-full hands-on collaging workshopwe will dive into the depths of our very being, find our own unique soulsignature, and express it through mixed media collage.

The clarity of self-image is a necessityin manifesting the life that is your heartsdesire. To hold a self-created image of WHO YOU ARE is atalisman for growth; a gift that keeps on giving for years to come. Youwill be given tools of self-awareness that can be utilized in your studio andcareer, to access your soul through this creative technique at any time youneed to connect with yourself for answers, guidance, or fun.

Under Your Skin

Our bodies carry infinite stories, memories, and messages…

yet we often forget or totally overlook the magical clustersof cells that we are.

Anatomy is a powerful metaphor for ouremotional, spiritual, and mental worlds that exist far beyond the physical. In this body-minded course we look closely at the rich territory of thehuman body as bones, organs, cells, muscles, and tissue, and cultivate theability to look deeeep into what lies under our skin as metaphor.

Visual Memoir with Photography

Join us as we share parts of ourselvesthrough the combination of words and pictures, discovering how each of us has avital message that can inspire and ignite beauty in the world. We willcelebrate the bond we share through our trials and triumphs ~ using personalimagery and text to illustrate the story of our lives, and reveal new layers oftruth about the amazing people we are!

Remember, the Artfest site goes live on August 1st, and Registration begins September 3rd.

my soul on the soul-stice

2011-06-22T00:56:00.000-07:00

How was your summer solstice? Did you do anything special?

I went for a walk in Oxford's Port Meadow, one of my favorite places in the world. My intention for the day was to anchor my soul's intentions and creative ventures into the expansive energies of the day, semi-expecting to be zonked out in a field for hours meditating my brains out (literally).

Instead, I ended up MAKING MOVIES!!!! Standing in the center of a large indented circle in the center of a clearing, spiraling with energy .... suddenly my camera was up and in action. It's not unusual for me to document moments of my life with the camera, but hmmmm ..... this is a new twist :)

How's that for spontaneity???? How's that for anchoring creativity into expansive venturing???? Especially since I was all kinds of grubbed out, no hair, no makeup ..... And you know what? I had the BEST TIME. Somehow the fact that I didn't prepare was what made it so much fun. I was without a clock, and just traipsed all over the meadow with my camera until my battery died. When I reunited with a clock, 6 hours had passed!

SIX HOURS????? It felt like two.

So here is my first spontaneously created I'm-not-going-to-listen-to-the-voice-inside-that-stops-me-from-enjoying-myself-because-for-once-I-don't-even-hear-it video clip extraordinaire. Please forgive the lack of tripod and general technical savvy-ness, and enjoy :)

Soul-stice Love

2011-06-21T00:20:00.000-07:00

Happy Soul-stice! May you connect deeply with the essence of your soul, harnessing the unique imprint of your being ~ and integrating further into your unity with the All That Is.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

I Am ...

2011-06-17T23:31:00.000-07:00

A few days ago, I nestled in to my meditation. I closed my eyes, took a deeeeep breath and immediately heard these words accompanied by a bright visual blast of this illustration.

So, I brought it into form. Voilah! A meditation muse / visual mantra. Yay!

I ♡ divine inspiration :)

Glastonbury: Shimmery and Swollen

2011-06-07T23:49:00.000-07:00

Glastonbury. The sacred land of Avalon. I continue to create images out of photos taken while I was there for a short 24 hours that felt like a few lifetimes. The land surrounding the tiny village of Glastonbury touches my soul, my heart, the tips of my toes and the ancient guts of the deepest essence in me. More to come, and *someday* I shall write a bit about the Glastonbury energy and experiences that are swollen and shimmery inside me. For now, pictures will have to do :)

The top image is a self-portrait taken at the Chalice Well, where an healing abundant spring bubbles up from the ground, and the energy of the Divine Feminine is exquisitely present.

The image below is a self-portrait from the Glastonbury Abbey ruins, where King Arthur and Guinevere were buried ... and where magical masculine / feminine energies continue to weave themselves together through crumbling stone walls and sparkling blades of grass.

As Above, So Below ... and Being the In-Between

2011-05-31T06:20:00.000-07:00

I am having some intense emotional / clearing / integrating / accelerations and experiences lately, aren't you?

My experiences have led me deeply inward, and simultaneously outward into the global energies that so many of us are feeling.

The age old saying 'As above, so below' has never been more true. The Heavens and the Earth are moving toward the same goal: each are expanding into and releasing a combination of energies which bear unique signatures, yet they are of the same vibrational intention. Each plays a part, and the sum total of their energies IS 'The Shift', the catchphrase that is on the tongue of conscious lips across the globe.

The earth is very much alive, buzzing with an ecstatic awakening, and sending spiraling swirls of energy upward from the ground. This earth energy is ancient and new all at once, and consists of the female Gaia or Mary consciousness. Any connection with the Earth, whether directly or in intention through the heart, will immediately plug us in to these upward spirals of energy. The Earth's chakra points are extremely active right now, and every last drop of dirt on the planet is infused with ripples coming from the major vortexes (and bursting forth through seismic activity), to the point that you literally could not find an inactive patch of grass or stone if you tried.

Likewise, the heavens are electric, spiraling down to earth an energy loaded with cosmic light and infused with the consciousness of Christ energy. Each and every individual star and constellation, planet and galaxy, cloud and weather pattern are unified in a synchronized dance of cosmic union, bringing the higher to the lower, and carrying the lower back to the higher, releasing all that is not to be. This is a mirror of our own personal journeys of illuminating our shadows through the divine process of integration, wholeness and self-forgiveness.

(The wind is also a point of power, carrying messages and a unique vibration that encompasses the above and below yet also dangles in it's own wholeness.)

Where these upward and downward spiraling energies meet they are synergized, and therefore communicate and activate with one another the light codes necessary to facilitate the shifting of the Earth as we know it. It is through this union of male (sky, above) and female (earth, below) energies that the planet is shifting, and it is the meeting together of the male Christ energy and the female Gaia/Mary energy that we, as individual personal energies, are feeling a gravitational pull that frankly, sometimes feels like hell.

I don't know about you, but lately it's been feeling like this is tearing my heart and guts out ... then suddenly I'm in the throes of a heart expansion / kundalini rising that leaves me speechless (literally - anyone else having a disconnection from language these days?), with my only viable means of assimilating it being a nap or even better, a 10 hour sleep marathon.

I feel these energies on a tangible level as a spiraling downward and upward, and yet they meet together in the space between. I can feel it in my physical body, and can also sense this point where the spirals meet within my expansive field of awareness. I can feel how these meeting places, or the paths they carve, or the way the tendrils weave together in the air around us potentially become a vortex of chaos if we don't slow down to stillness so that we can understand what is going on. I'm learning to use my kinesthetic / body awareness to bypass the chaos, and enter a vortex of great momentum that propels me into my greatest yet-to-be. Like so many of you, I've got something big and beautiful inside me, that can struggle a bit to set itself free if I choose to tangle up in chaos, instead of surrendering to the powerful momentum of the energy surrounding us now.

One of the ways I surrender to the momentum is to align with the natural world, by communing with nature in all forms. When I do this, it all slows down and makes sense, and I can see and feel myself as the in-between, a specific and necessary point where the energies converge. When I am out of sorts and caught up in the chaos vortex, I am simply out of alignment, and the vortex hell - as we all know - can be quite uncomfortable, which is our alarm system that we need to find alignment. The thing is, when I soften up and ride the waves, the softening IS my alignment, and I experience the waves simply as expansions and contractions ... the in-breath and out-breath ... the opening and closing of the heart muscle in every heart beat .... the very pulse that rockets through my veins.

On the expansion, or in breath, or opening, I receive the light. I open wide and the pouring down spiralling blissful soul-soaring of light just IS. I open and open and oooooooopppppeeeeennnnn wide to gulp it down in ecstatic spiritual joy.

...... Expand to receive .....

Then, the contraction follows. A closing, a deepening, a prickling uprising of all that exists in me that does not align with the above new dose of expansion and light. I'm sore, I ooze a bit, and it hurts to breathe. I have new opportunities to love and forgive, as old tangles within me arise to be illuminated.

..... Contract to release .....

As these spiraling waves come in and out and up and down, we are feeling them, even if we don't identify them as such. Nature is definitely singing a song to us now, and anyone who listens will hear an increased symphony, like an intoxicating elixir that soothes the soul and helps us ride the waves. You may not experience or translate the energy the same way I do, but I guarantee you will feel an increase of inner peace, or a keen self-understanding when you slow it down a notch and nap under a tree, soak up the rays of the sun, stare at the ceiling of stars that is our night sky, smile when drops of rain hit your face, or your hair whips around in the wind.

As above, so below ....... in, out, expand, contract ...... and everything in between. We are the in-between. We are the channels through which this energy shimmers and pours, we expand and contract to receive it, release, it and integrate it. How lucky are we?!?! Being the in-between is really alllllll about riding the waves, integrating the expansiveness, honoring the contractions ....

and remembering who we came here to be.

Spirituality & Health Magazine

2011-05-25T06:00:00.000-07:00

I was very happy when Spirituality & Health magazine contacted me, and asked if I'd be interested in being the featured artist for their May/June issue. The answer was easily a yes. Below is the copy from the write-up, as well as the following four pages. :)

You can find your copy absolutely everywhere in the US,

in places like Whole Foods and Barnes and Noble.

The Place in Between

2011-05-16T01:12:00.000-07:00

These are funny times. Not funny ha-ha, but funny strange. As in, I am speechless and can't keep up with the massive groanings and shifts of the planet and my soul. There is a great peace moving through me that is kicking up tired and dirty bits, rising them up to the surface so they can be illuminated, understood, loved, and released. The peace moves in an all-encompassing vastness but carries in it's center a speeding cyclone of truth that exhumes old piles of skeleton-y 'stuff' that doesn't resonate with the peace. It's an oxymoron all in it's self, really - the most unpeaceful peace but peaceful peace EVER. It is exhausting and exhilarating all at once. It's like my body / soul is the planet herself, with lots of earthquakes and extreme weather patterns. I'm at my wits end yet completely aware of extreme unseen beginnings all at once. My emotions feel a bit wild, my usual very sensitive senses are even more heightened, and yet my exterior world hasn't quite caught up to the massive shiftings inside. I can't even really describe what is happening, but it feels rather epic. Because nothing makes sense anymore, except a deep longing for bigger, better, brighter .... and a connection to something much more *real* than what is 'real'.

Does this sound familiar to anyone else? Is there anyone out there who feels this way, or is it just me? I'd love to know I'm not alone .... because that seems to be a side effect of all this earthquaking / wild weather inside me. It feels very alone. (As I write this my guts are telling me this is how it's supposed to be - a solitary experience of inner purging / peacemaking).

Anyone?

(these images are still spill-overs from my mini-pilgrimage to glastonbury. the one just below was posted a couple weeks ago but i've changed it since, hence the re-post)

Inner Peace = World Peace

2011-05-09T00:07:00.000-07:00

peace photo by unknown

thinking about peace.

when i preach peace, do i practice what i preach?

the answer is often no ... and so i fall into a deep space of super duper awareness.

the events of the last week have given me opportunity,

(edit: the death of osama bin laden)

and i am suddenly acutely aware of every second that i do not practice peace.

seeing the pieces of peace

and the pieces of war that live inside me.

the ways i terrorize myself,

the ways i point the finger at others ...

when in fact, i can be my own worst 'enemy'.

i cannot expect world peace until there is peace inside me.

i cannot judge anyone for not practicing peace, because

i wage wars inside of myself every day.

(my thoughts and emotions are a battlefield more than i would like to admit)

i believe that we can achieve world peace.

i believe we can stop the killing, the terror, the wars, the lies.

but we have to find the proverbial peace like a river

that can only flow from deep inside ....

from the inside out is the only way it's going to happen.

we've got to find our inner peace.

in order to do that we've got to acknowledge our inner wars.

~ and our inner terrorist ~

and love that little inner terrorist to bits,

because inner violence is not going to make it better.

i know my inner terrorist quite well.

she tries very very very hard to squash me, to keep me small, to make sure my dreams stay far away.

no one cares.

you are wrong.

you are so stupid.

how dare you?

be quiet.

you are going to get hurt.

you are having too much fun, you need to be punished.

you should be ashamed of yourself.

and more.

she tells me i am crap, rubbish, pointless, worthless, and don't deserve even life.

and she has some very serious opinions about the way other people should be,

and can get rather furious when things aren't the way she wants them to be.

she springs from early life, and has always been with me, accumulating rage for years.

i've fought her with all the powers within me. i've raged right back at her, throwing back all the things she makes me feel, right back into her face.

leave me alone!

i hate you!

i am going to win this fight for freedom!

you are a miserable, worthless vile train of thought!

stop this stupidity right now, it is getting you nowhere!!!

***sigh***

that doesn't really help me so much, because it perpetuates the anger inside me.

the thing is, when i remember to look her in the eye,

and soften my gaze into her angry little face,

i see (and feel) a pile of massive hurt.

i see (and feel) an inner terrorist who is actually a little little little girl, trying to make the hurts inside her all better by pretending to be a big meanie.

she is not mean.

she is hurting and doesn't know what else to do.

and those hurts need my attention, my compassion, and my self-responsibility.

do you get it?

inner peace comes from looking at the war-maker inside us, and seeing UNDER the aggression.

it helps us in our battles with other people, too.

my inner warmonger can be really belligerent and filled with slippery little ways of harming and judging others and myself.

THE WAY I TREAT MYSELF IS THE WAY I TREAT OTHERS.

when i am practiced at war within myself, it's easy for me to turn that war onto others,

to slip right into violent and judgmental thinking:

she really should not be wearing that color.

what a bitch ... i can't wait to tell so-and-so about this latest drama!

who the hell does he think he is?

that person/celebrity/politician is completely off their rocker, and makes me blind with rage.

get out of my way fellow commuter, or i am going to push you out of my way!

(but what if that person is filled with just as many hurts inside as i am?)

(even though they may not know it ....)

(what if the same thing that motivates them in their acts of aggression is the VERY SAME thing that motivates me? .... fear of rejection, of being hurt, of being walked on, of being seen as weak?)

and then there is of course the verbal imaginary wars we have in our heads, complete with preemptive strikes and strategies against our foe that fill our heads and hearts with aggressive possibilities before they even happen.

inner / outer aggression is always caused by a previous hurt, and the way we've learned to defend ourselves from it ever happening again.

and

we have all been taught by

parents, teachers, schools, friends, politics, books, television and film, and our experiences

that being better than, smarter than, more religious / spiritual / philosophical than, a better color than, a better sex than, richer than etc

is the way we survive, to never be hurt again.

or, to never ever ever lose another 'war'.

that if we place ourselves apart from whoever we are better than,

(even aspects of ourselves)

it means we will survive, that we won't be wounded in the battle

and that we are the most powerful.

we aren't ...

TRUE POWER LIES IN WILLINGNESS TO DROP THE FEAR THAT KEEPS US IN THE ENERGY OF AGGRESSION.

I guarantee it, 150 billion %, that when you find the place of connection, love and compassion for your inner warmonger, you will find acts of outer aggression fade away.

150 billion % guarantee.

If we all drop our emotional / physical weapons, there won't be anything to fight about.

and to continue to follow the illusion that War = Power on a personal or global level is going to be our undoing.

today i cultivate peace inside.

there is nothing about me that is better than you.

there is nothing about me that is better than anyone, so nothing real to battle over.

and there is nothing about anyone that is better than me, so therefore nothing to defend against.

i am you.

you are me.

when i love (and understand) myself

(all parts of me, including the battlefields and war-maker)

i can love (and understand) you even better.

which makes me love me better.

which creates more love for you.

which creates more peace inside me.

which ripples out into the world.

this amazing peace photo by unknown

I Am

2011-04-28T00:43:00.000-07:00

(click on picture for larger image)

becoming more aware of all parts ... the integration of shadow and light.

it has always been present in my work, but a new layer of awareness has dawned.

with the dawning has come a disappearing of the old - my yearlong body of work has shifted.

i'm dangling in between the old and the new ....

waiting for the new expression to come forward in a way that surges and carries me off on it's thunder shower wings.

the impressions of the expressions that sit in my soul are loud, they are astronomical, they are a fierce force to be reckoned with.

but they are taking their sweet time to launch into this physical dimension.

but i feel it in the deepest seed roots of my cells, something bold is brewing.
for now, i'm just playing and trying not to become creatively frustrated.
but going with the flow, surrendering and trusting the space in between.

*sigh*

it is a beautiful magical divine thing, creativity.

i love being an artist.

(the above is a self portrait taken on the Tor in Glastonbury)

A Walk in the Countryside

2011-04-26T23:50:00.000-07:00

This is what I cherish and adore about England: the countryside. It is green, lush, and alive with murmurs, whispers, and portals to history and beyond. It calms me, calls to me, and fills me to the tiptop with a sense of belonging and perfection.

A simple walk in the middle of nowhere becomes an enchanted experience, where the trees tickle your soul and flowers serenade your senses ~ all six of them. This field of brilliant yellow flowers became a quiet sanctuary for me, as I sat tucked between millions of stalks, and felt supremely connected to Mama Nature.

I would love to live in this cottage, surrounded by lush trees, nestled beside a sweet little river.

And my new Lensbaby Composer Lens has developed a serious case of co-dependence with my camera. I cannot take it off. I've tried ~ but there is something magical about the blur and distortion. To my eye it makes every photo an artsy humdinger, that just fits with the way I see things, and resonates with the whimsy of my soul.

Portugal

2011-04-20T23:34:00.000-07:00

Here are a few snaps from my recent adventure to Portugal. More can be seen on my beautiful new web site: www.erinfaithallen.com

Have I mentioned how much I ♡LOVE♡ experiencing the world? It is my Numero Uno Dream to travel our sumptuous scrumptious planet and make art about the Earth, my journeys, and the way the Earth talks to me. Full time. Full speed ahead!

Already planning my next adventure!

stream of consciousness and my ♡'s desire

2011-04-15T00:14:00.000-07:00

so much beauty to see through my lens

so much of the world to feel in my heart.

i carry the pulse of the planet in my veins

it thumps

howls

and flows

like a mighty whirlpool opera of sirens

bellowing me to silence upon their shores.

i cannot stop the songs

the sounds

the heartbeats

that feed my own.

i make pictures to quell the incessant call.

but the symphony silence of siren's roar

grows

ever

louder

longer

stronger

fuller.

until i hear nothing

feel nothing

see absolutely nothing

but this insatiable pungent tangible hunger to hear, see, and feel it all.

(photos of avalon and glastonbury, uk © erin faith allen)

Dive Deep and Loom Large

2011-04-05T23:57:00.000-07:00

A new piece, created about a month ago, named 'Dive Deep'.

There is such rearranging now ... time is flyyyyying by so quickly. My creative urge/need/core of my being is speeding up and expanding along with the acceleration of time. I'm beginning to feel like a Thanksgiving Day Parade balloon, blown up to full capacity and suspended in air, tethered by ropes ... but the anchor of the ropes is moving, too. So I just loom, oversized in mid air, with a silly grin on my face. (And wait for the moment I break free and fly away!)

As I write I'm noticing the polar opposites of the title and content of the art piece above, and the metaphor of being an over-filled balloon floating in mid air. I think that sums up perfectly the juxtaposition / oxymoron existence of my life right now. It's all about being comfortable in all of it, though, isn't it?

The rearranging I mentioned is happening underneath the surface of everything, and creates a tension between Doing and Being like I've never felt before. On the one hand, my heart is full and longs to go into a myriad of actions. On the other, there is somehow not the substance/time/focus available with which to bring the action into being. It can be very confusing and frustrating. And so, I just sit in whatever focus I can, and do what feels right. Moment by moment. Breath by breath. I'm choosing to trust my big beautiful soul and the benevolent energies of our Universe. *sigh*. All is well. Do you know why? Because I also choose to accept each moment. Unattached. And let it pass by and be what it is. (Easy to do when you are a giant silly balloon!) Oh. My. Goodness. The Freedom in that? HUGE.

One focus that has felt right is building a new website and today it has gone live :) How satisfying to work so diligently and see results.
You can visit here: www.erinfaithallen.com

Glastonbury: the Gift that Keeps on Giving

2011-03-31T12:11:00.000-07:00

I've been going a little bit bonkers about my photos from Glastonbury. You see, the 27 hours I spent there were at the top of the list of the very best hours of my life. As ever, I process my experiences through my artwork and so I'm in the midst of doing some mixed media pieces about the magical Isle of Avalon and my precious minutes there.

These photos are just a few little fun thingies I've been playing with. The elements and history spoke to me in Glastonbury, and told me all kinds of things .... part of the magic for me was that I experienced moment after moment of getting it ... and knowing things. As an energy intuitive / mega empath I am accustomed to feeling things in monumental ways, but this was off the charts.

As I continue to let the experience wash through me, and seek words and imagery expressive of my little journey to the heart chakra of the Earth

- that is what Glastonbury is, you know -

I'm preoccupied with my photos and this is the fruit of my playtime :)

i am a big fat giant

2011-03-28T09:45:00.000-07:00

my giant self in glastonbury

I've been in another place of quiet lately. The deep sleepy slumbering quiet of a giant who continues to grow ever taller, wider, deeper in it's stillness. Who knows the purity of existence is about the moments in between. Who delights in solitude and feels freedom of expression course through my veins when all is still and I'm heart to heart with nature. Who can read the waves of energy and takes comfort in the big swooshes, and the delicate trickles. Who knows they are all the same anyway, and that the only thing that matters is to breathe and always always always BE the stillpoint. Who sometimes forgets this but always always always comes back to it. A giant who stretches and flexes, becoming aware suddenly of my own strength, power, gifts, and effortlessly flicks off illusions and limitations. The cool thing about discovering ones' giantness is the simultaneous realization that those illusions and limitations are so puny, not even real, let alone enough to stop my flow or trick my giantness into feeling small.

I am feeling the shiftings of the planet as she, too, wakes from sleep and expands into greater dimensions of herself. Do you feel it, too? Do you feel it within yourself, as you also feel it in the Earth and rippling through the consciousness around you? These are big times, my friends. We are here to soften, to expand, and to allow the sleeping giants within us to rise and create a world that is as expanded as we are.

There is change in the air, in the water, in the earth, in the sweet Spirit of all that is ... it is here. It is happening now, and will happen with us or without us. I for one, am choosing to shift with the shift, to ride the waves that pulsate, tremble, and rollercoaster me all over the place. I'm noticing that if I relax, breathe, and stay in a vibration of love and trust the ride is much easier. When I tighten, contract, and resist I experience great pain - physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, and energetic. The tightening is a symptom of the old way of being me - it is a scrunching in, a way of curling into a tiny speck of a person that thinks it is nothing. The thing is, I know that as a newly expanded giant person, there are going to be some rooms I just don't fit into anymore. There are going to be work places and relationships and roles that constrict the blood flow and life force, that literally feel as if cramming myself into them cuts off my circulation. For me, the freedom lies within the awareness that I don't have to stay crammed into the room, the job, or the role. I am a giant! I can rise above the whole darn thing. By embracing and living in our fully expanded selves we will, by the very nature of uncurling from our tightened crammed-in posture, grow beyond and above the very thing we are perceiving is holding us in.

Live your giant* life people! The more of us who rise up out of that which doesn't fit, the more room there will be for a big, giant Universe that fits all of us. We are the waymakers, the ones who See the need for a bigger way of living.

*(by the way, I am not at all referring to ego-giantness. My giant speak is all about things like love, faith, visionary causes, big beautiful joyful careers, connectedness, heartful living, creative expansion, sustainable living, Oneness and seriously delicious stuff like that.)

The cool thing about giants is that they are soooo rooted on the earth. They are the most grounded archetype I can think of, except maybe a tree. But giants are heavy, stompy, and strong. They don't flit around like a fairy, or wisp away from shadow or light. In order to anchor the new earth that is big enough for our beautiful bountiful giant consciousness, we need to be as a bridge, firmly planted on both sides. It is necessary is to have two feet stomping firmly on the ground and two powerful hands reaching up to the heavens to bring down the light.

For years I've learned, stretched, grown through many lessons, fears and tears. My biggest challenge was always to realize who I am and to live from a place of authentic self-awareness. Suddenly, I'm there. Isn't that amazing? Literally, overnight, I GET IT. While I may still be 5 feet 4 and a half inches tall, I feel big. I feel capable, focused, aware. I'm ready world!!!! I know what I want most out of life, and it is big, hot stuff. It makes me feel all sizzly and epic when I think about it, like a billion rainbows shooting out of my heart. It is real, so real I watch movies about it in my head all day, while tears well up in my eyes that also happen to be overflowing with shooting stars.

So here I am, suddenly a glorious giant wad of Holy Crap I So Get It

and

I'm Ready World

and

Bring It.

How beautiful is that? I'm large and in charge!

Do you have that KNOWING about yourself? It's sooooooo flippin' beautiful, isn't it? It lives deep in *that* place ... that place which happens to be your Soul. Your perfect pinprick-yet-oh-so-expansive essence that is uniquely perfectly you. That flippity dippity fiery burny churny deep down high up spark of life that drives you forward, that lights you up, that lifts you up. That place that is your is-ness. That sings your song. That spells out the very reasons you were born.

(Did you hear me, Universe? I'm ready! BRING IT!!!!!)

Are you ready for the Universe to Bring It to you?

at the top of the Tor, Glastonbury

equinox in glastonbury

2011-03-22T07:42:00.000-07:00

glastonbury.

i spent the equinox there on the sacred ground of avalon, and there are no words. the magnitude of earth and history swelling up to erase the veil ... you know, the veil? there is none in glastonbury, this holy holy place that defies description.

my body is still humming from the energy, even now sitting in my cozy home in london.

my brain wants to attach words and meanings ...

but my heart knows

that it awoke

in a powerful

empowered

monumental

super-cali-fragilistic-expy-alidocious way.

thank you glastonbury.

thank you sweet planet.

thank you vision,

sight,

clarity,

love,

magic,

history,

my future,

right now,

sacred energy

and

my sensitivity.

2011-03-14T11:03:00.000-07:00

Through March 31st, every time you purchase *ANY* and *ALL* items in my Etsy shop, I will donate 60% to the Red Cross Japan Relief.

http://www.etsy.com/shop/erinfaithallen?ref=pr_shop_more

be the change!

2011-02-15T09:43:00.000-08:00

so inspired by life right now, by events / synchronicities / new friends ...

happy happy happy.

this is what happens when i play with photoshop whilst glowing from the inside out :)

london, between the lines

2011-02-10T01:20:00.000-08:00

i live between the lines in london.

this city is loud (it deafens me)

it's edges are big (it overwhelms me)

and everything moves fast.

too fast for me to keep up, so i tuck inside myself and watch it whiz by.

i take in what i can, what i will, and what wants to be seen.

and there is so much in london to feel.

the hurry, the history, the layers of sturdy surviving.

'keep your head down and get on with it'

'keep calm and carry on' -

mantras which have been interestingly integrated into my dreamy disposition!

i am forever grateful

the tangled streets mirror my own snarls back to me,

and the color grey rules this city ... grey grey grey.

the grey bled my shadow into me,

so that i might see

what really lived inside me -

inside my own hurried history.

my grey bled back to color eventually;

i'm learning to project my rainbow swirls
into the fast grey streets around me.

that feels much better than soaking up the grey like a color-blind sponge.

and i love the thames,

the ancient watery snake that squiggles and feeds

the curly streets of london.

imagining myself a rainbow,

i walk her bridges on repeat,

back and forth

letting the water talk to me,

singing it's secret hymns into the ear that lives inside me.

i spray my colors back into her,

thanking her

loving her for who she is and who she's been and who she'll always be.

loving the tangles,

loving the grey

loving london in spite of myself ....

for i have those qualities too ...

i am everything, i am me, i am london, i am you.

i stay tucked in

and weave my silence through the noise

and breathe my calm through the hurry

and splash my color through the grey.

i am made of words and stars

2011-02-03T23:09:00.000-08:00

The Real Me, and My Epiphany

2011-01-23T06:06:00.000-08:00

I've had an epiphany, one that has been elusive for almost two years in spite of constant searching. One that has kept me hungry. Seeking. Sobbing. Reaching. Diving. Drowning. Believing.

Let me start at the beginning: nearly two years ago I took a big, fat, flying leap, leaving my carefully constructed and safe life behind. My heart longed to know itself. My soul was calling out to me. An opportunity landed in my lap, and I answered with a resounding YES! You see, I believed in dreams coming true. I believed in following my bliss. I believed my time had come. Off the cliff of safety I flew, into a vast and illogical who-knows-what-will happen-next, and embarked on a journey of a lifetime.

Nine days into my journey, (February 11, 2009 if you must know) I was sitting in a cafe in the Czech Republic. My journal lay splayed out before me, as I sipped my tea and marveled at the wonder of my life: for several days I had been living a dream to wander in foreign territory with my blessed camera and my pen and notebook ... to breathe in newness, history, and freedom through my creativity. It was early morning. The snow was blowing delicately through narrow and cobbled streets. To tell you all the details underscoring this journey and this day would require writing a book, so I shall stick to the point for now.

There, on those very streets where Beethoven and Mozart had wandered, my soul began singing to me. I listened. It belted out original Erin symphonies, with layers upon layers of sensation, vision, and emotion. I felt, I saw, I invited more. My heart opened wider than words could describe ... everything opened wide. My insides felt immense, expanded, delicious, fuzzy, sparkly, eternal. Peace underscored every insight. No stranger to visioning and deep internal experience, I knew this was a new level of knowingness that comes from deep connection within, to the belly of soul. There were no limits, no boundaries. The joy inside was tremendous, even for me - no stranger to expansive happiness. My visions were of love, creativity, sharing light and joy. And being whole, free, and living in my supreme potential. I saw it all. I felt it all. And most importantly, I felt ME. Unabashed, unfettered, completely 1000% aaaalllllll of me at once. In real time, in future time, in past time. Everything ME all rolled into one joyous ball of human flesh. It was all possible, because it was all real. So this is the fruit of my years of spiritual reachings, healing, and therapy!, I thought with great joy. I've arrived!

Am I making sense? Do you know that feeling? Haven't you felt it before?

The rest of my day was glorious. I wandered, explored, and basked in this exquisite opening. That's what it was. An opening. An opening of consciousness, time, body, mind, soul, geography, portals, vortexes. It was perfection. My physical vision continued to expand beyond what 'normal' human eyes see. All day, everywhere I explored, I saw - literally - layers and light. Light rained down from the sky, indoors and outdoors. In sheets, in drops, in streaks.

(The photos here all from that day, with the exception of the top photo which was taken when I flew out of Los Angeles a few days earlier. Thanks to my obsession with documenting moments through my camera, here are a few photos of the moments described above. This is what my camera did, or what the light did, or something. I have not touched these with any photo editing whatsoever.)

I knew my life had just shifted, how could it be otherwise, with all that light? Ooooooohhhhh that is the understatement of the century. It did. In short, within two days my journey led me into my deepest darkness, fears, shadows, traumas, wounds, subconscious, unconscious, ancestry ... you name it. All of that light and expansion seemed to disappear. I was locked in an epic struggle.

Epic. For the better part of two years.

For the majority of the next two years, I felt lost. Broken. Shattered. Unfamiliar to myself. Alone. Lonely. For starters. My journey took me to foreign countries, and back to my roots. My life was both put on hold and accelerated beyond comprehension. Everything familiar disappeared: people, possessions, culture ... and the Me I thought I was. Everything went black, shattered, raw, numb, and there were many moments I felt the aching need to leave the planet for good. I am here today only because of an incredible desire to grow ever stronger - and the steadfast love of the few human angels who stood by my side in my darkest, ugliest, most excruciating hours. Because they showed love to me while I felt hideously unlovable, I began to see that something about me must be worth loving. And so I set out to love myself.

There were countless moments of reaching back into that time in Prague with all the light and the freedom and the truth of who I am. But although the memory was there, the experience itself was out of reach. The self-connection turned from one of peace, knowingness, beauty and soul into a grim battle of the uglies. Disturbed that my years of spiritual seeking could not help me pick myself up, I tried to believe in a higher purpose. It was beyond comprehension that such beautiful peace could give way to such ... horror.

Two years later, in the very early morning hours, I sit in London. A survivor. A tired but decorated soul warrior. My meditations these days have been infused with a fervent desire to reconnect with my wonder-filled joy, one of the casualties lost in the trenches of the inner battlefield of Erin Faith Allen. In quiet moments before dawn my heart has been seeking that innocent, playful version of itself that used to run wild in me, before the last two years splattered me into smithereens. That believed anything was possible. That careened through life on a whimsical thread, with a very big smile, an overflowing cup of belief in dreams coming true, and a few hefty dollaps of magic.

I've called out through time and space to the eternal Me. To the highest power of love in our benevolent Universe. The one who Knows. To my Higher Self. Reached through the ethers to that expansion of time in Cafe Ebel in snowy Prague, to the four walls holding the aroma of ham, cheese, bread and espresso, and the girl whose heart and soul collided because she believed. I've tried so hard to keep believing. Through artmaking, meditation, prayer, nature-wandering, yoga, inspirational reading, channelings, teachings, journaling, crying, hiding, and total shutdown I've done it all.

Reach up, fall down. Stretch, break. Dive in, drown, swim to shore.

WHY did I experience such blissful alignment of everything I'd been reaching for all those years, only to fall into a heartbreaking chain of emotions and experiences that wouldn't let up?

Here's my epiphany:

In that collapse of time and expansion of light I saw, felt, tasted my potential. My essence. My reason for living on this planet. All of my freedom, creativity, visionary capabilities, joy, love, peace ... my REALITY in the infinite-expanded-someday-of-what-Is. Because I believed.

But something big had to happen before I could step into this expanded version of me. I had to face my whole self in order to shine my brightest light. My positivity-reaching, magic-believing was a very real and vital part of me - and it was also a mask. I clung to it ferociously, casting off my inner shadows because they weren't spiritual / positive energy / comfortable / high-vibed. I thought if my mind focused on positive thoughts alone in a higher plane of consciousness, that would be enough to shift me into the next level of my spiritual potential. Guess what? That theory, along with my mask literally obliterated under that intense opening of light in Prague, revealing my shadowy bits* who came out to play. It wasn't pretty underneath my skin, not pretty at all.

(* shadowy bits: my aching sadness. desperation to be loved. avoidance of early-life traumas. avoidance of all kinds of shoved away memories-never-dealt-with, actually. chronic inner panic. crippling self-hatred and shame. never believing i was good enough, yet expecting perfection of myself. for starters.)

(Are you still with me? I am kinda writing a book apparently.)

The moral of my story / epiphany is this:

Shadow and Light are one in the same. Because they are both a part of us. One can't exist without the other. One is not better than the other. One is not 'positive', and the other isn't 'negative'.
They just are. And the sooner we accept them both, the better.

Our shadowy bits need our light. So bad. And we are denying the power of our light if we don't allow it to shine onto our shadow.

If we deny our shadowy bits we are ALSO denying our greatest potential. !!!!! If we wear a mask, we are not just 'covering' shadowy bits, we are covering our light! Denial of any part of ourselves perpetuates fragmentation, brokenness, and duality. Duality is an either/or. Duality is not wholeness. Duality is not Oneness. If we cannot claim our shadow, our light is hollow. If we cannot be at One with ourselves, can we experience and participate in universal Oneness? In just being all that we are, we are at One.

Did you take that in?

To be our greatest potential is to be whole. To be whole = to be happy, loving, compassionate, creative, abundant; so who isn't on a quest for wholeness? Wholeness requires ALL of our self to be identified, embraced, and brought into the light; into love, self-forgiveness, compassion, and embraced in total acceptance. Integration of all the fragmented aspects of self into a whole requires just that - Integration. To reach our greatest potential we must be honest with ourselves about ALL of who we are. Right down to the nitty-gritty, 'unlovable', shocking, shoved-really-far-deep-down-inside parts of ourselves. We can deny all of those parts of ourselves, but they will surface ... no matter what we do to ignore them.

Trust me.

The last two years have changed me. Actually, I think a better way to say it is this: Over the last two years, my whole self has been revealed to me. And all those shadowy bits I avoided like the dickens for so many years? My shadowy bits - just like yours - only wanted my love, compassion, and integration. Why do I want to love myself? Because it's the only thing that works. Simple as that. Little by little, bit by bit, I'm integrating that brilliant light with the deep shadows. Slowly but surely, my joy is returning.

Because I asked.

Because I believe.

A few little bonuses of my intense two years: Effortless calm, and actual focus. My feelings can be vocalized, if I choose. Decision-making is no longer terrifying. Self-responsibility is my new best friend. So are forgiving, letting go, surrendering, taking a stand, and holding a healthy boundary. My creativity is grounded, and intuition spot on. My own history is what it is - and loving myself not only in spite of, but because of it is my modus operandi. My inner strength is a mighty container for what once used to shatter me into a million pieces. No longer do I seek my answers from outside of myself, for the truth can only be found inside my brilliant soul. And I can do all that alone, without validation from anyone. Gone are the days of earning love by being good, wearing my happy mask like a good little girl. !!!!!!

So, in the end, embracing my shadowy bits actually led me into more peaceful ways of being.

This tells me that when joy returns it will be as epic - if not more so! - as the last two years.

This is the journey of a lifetime. As it would turn out, underneath it all I'm a lot stronger, smarter, and shinier than even my mask was. I am unstoppable, surviving the gut-wrenching work of integrating all my bits together into one glorious glowing ball of love, art, and possibility! Today, I sit here writing from a deep, anchored, sacred space of KNOWING that I AM BEING what I experienced in that expanded space of time and light in the little cafe in the Czech Republic. Shrug. Just had to do a little shadow walkin' in order to figure it all out for myself.

That's right, people! You heard me!

(ooh ooh! was that joy talking? wink wink)

Ahhh ... the roaring internal battlefield has offered some brilliant booty!

But seriously, people ...

We are all talking about Unity Consciousness and Oneness these days.
We must get serious about healing our communities and planet.
We must.

It starts inside me and you.

It ripples out.
We can change the world.
But we have to look inside ourselves first.
The Real Us. The Whole Us.
We must be a united front within, in order to be united out there, across the globe.

I believe this.
Do you?

I'm learning to live as (and love!) the Real Me.

Are you the Real You?

why i love blurry photos

2011-01-14T01:52:00.000-08:00

Why do I love blurry photos so much?

If photography is an extension of the soul, am I just a big ball of blur inside, or is there more than meets the eye to taking and viewing blurry photos?

Cut to an email I received last week from a friend. In summary, the story it told was one of slowing down to take life in; to stop and notice the beauty that wants to emerge through all of our senses.

When photographing after twilight I shoot compulsively and haphazardly, engaging all of my senses – and especially my sixth. The blurry photos that result are indeed an extension of my soul, the core part of me that finds joy in letting the lens capture the imprints of time that is NOT linear. Beauty emerges in the moments in between, in the silence between words, in the unknown of an unanswered question, in the space of motion not illuminated by a synthetic flash of a camera. It exists all around us, waiting to drop into our awareness through any one of our senses in a movement of energy that is not always tangible. The open shutter of my camera simply observes the time that exists in ‘nonsensical’ squiggles and swooshes inside the rat race from point A to point Z.

According to The Dictionary, blur is: to dim the perception or susceptibility of; make dull or insensible: The blow on the head blurred his senses.

I challenge that definition though, with one of my own. According to Erin, blur is: to slow down and observe the motion of grace; to soften the focus of the human lens and engage all senses with the magic that dangles in the air all around us: The blow to his head allowed him to enjoy a blissful new view of the world – which resulted from the blurring of his senses.

My soul is not a big, fat, blurry wad of ambiguity. It is plump and pleasant, with a penchant for layered compositions of time that exists between the lines.

birthing stars

2011-01-05T12:31:00.000-08:00

birthing angry stars,

shedding tattered scars and

complicated internal sores and wars

i am hostage to my own awakening

my own earthquaking

splayed open, shaking

full of fear

but soul-shaping.

i ♡ tumblr. alot.

2011-01-02T02:06:00.000-08:00

The above amazingness by Cendrine Rovini is one of the reasons I've become obsessed with Tumblr. (This amazing piece makes me think of Persephone, pomegranate seeds and all - and we all know how much I love her).

You see, I haven't made art in months for many reasons that may reveal in future posts. I've been fallow. While fallowness should not be underestimated in it's importance, I've hit the point where it makes my soul ache. A lot. And to make matters worse, I am camera-less at the mo. My camera is my constant companion - my portable portal into my imagination. Without one, I'm feeling a wee bit lost. Lost and soul-achy? No bueno!

***(Do you have a DSLR you would like to sell? Please contact me ASAP if so - looking for a secondhand magic camera starting now! Email erin[at]erinfaithallen with deets, por favor?!)***

The winds of change are blowing ... all of my creatively-challanged bits are forming a mutiny against my perceived creativity obstacles, and any minute will carry me off to my studio for a frenzy of splashing ink, paint, and photos onto a variety of surfaces. I can feel it building ...

you know that feeling, right? when it all starts buzzing and swirling and your fingertips and armpits and every single pore fizzes with luminous imagery laden with a rainbow kaleidoscope of emotion and vision?

and you can't really see straight because you 'see' a whole world of what is about to pour out of your soul onto awaiting accomplice of canvas/paper/photograph?

and you don't know when it's going to explode and carry you away, but you know it is eminent? and you feel quite titillated knowing what is to come?

Until it comes, I'm happily indulging in Tumblr. The beauty tumbling around there is absolutely blowing my mind and revving up my eyeballs. I can't get enough, and it's acting as a springboard for my upcoming spilling over/bubbling out/soul explosion.

You can find my Tumblr here. If you are also a Tumblr, will you please 'follow' me so that I can discover the visions that speak to you?

(PS Looking through my friend Lynne Hoppe's inspiring Tumblr site is what inspired me to start my own. Thank you Lynne!!!!!!!)

16 Ways to Make Winter Wonder-full

2010-12-13T10:35:00.000-08:00

Every autumn my deep-insides start to do a funny little panic dance. It's so deep inside I barely notice it; even though it creeps up like clockwork the moment summer's light begins to fade, and nightfall arrives just a moment sooner than it did the day before.   My deep-insides start to hold their breath 'it's coming, it's coming!' until the breath-holding turns into a sort of emotional hyperventilation. Once the inevitable is acknowledged, that winter is indeed going to arrive, my breath deepens as does my call to the winter powers cultivated within. Over the years I've learned to appreciate the effects of winter on my emotional world ~ and therefore my creative world ~ though when the weather changes I start battening down the hatches and gripping the sides of my own soul. After many years of trial and tribulation, no longer do I dread, avoid, and beg myself to stay calm, peace-love-groovy, and sparkling.   I just let myself be, and the reward is huge. Can I live without a sun-kissed glow if it means an extended period of time to embrace my deep-diving Soul Diva?

Before I go further, let's talk about Light and why the sun is so darn good for us:
Like everything else ever, we humans are made up of energy. Energy moves and vibrates at different speeds and frequencies. Light is a very powerful conductor and nourisher of all levels of our human bodies: our physical, emotional, spiritual, mental, and energetic fields are all dependent on the yumminess that sunlight feeds us. When we experience less light, our bodies take a big hit, and everything begins to slow down, which mean our vibrational frequency lowers. When our energetic vibration begins to lower, our entire being begins to sink. Negative thoughts are more likely to creep in, motivation plunges, self-doubts start to breed, and a whole range of other less-than-enjoyable possibilities try to take over. It is always important to stay positive, but sunshine helps us SO much more than we realize ~ so winter is like a super-duper test of intention, gratitude and attitude. We need to do everything we can to keep our energy high, vibrating and clean. Sunshine is a shoe-in for the number one contributor to a high vibration, in my opinion, but there are a whole lot of other things you can do to feed yourself positive energy in the winter.

So, if you find yourself feeling low this time of year, feel free to join me in the honest to god truth of light deprivation effects. Since it's also the same time of year in which the holidays fall, we add a dash of hustle, bustle and stress into a mixing bowl of disconnected family or missed loved ones for a potential recipe of Bah Humbug. It's true, for some people the holidays somehow ooze out a bizarre undertow that constantly beckons and twirls at our feet.

But wait! You can have a different experience this year, I promise. How to resist the undertow, you ask?

Here's my advice: Don't run from it - run toward it. You will dramatically shift your energy by staring down whatever you are feeling, right into the center of it's wintery eyeballs.

For those of you reading from sunshine-even-in-winter places (hello motherland Los Angeles!), please bear in mind my location is L O N D O N. Has anyone ever spent a winter in England? Let me just say that it never quite lights up here in this otherwise remarkable country. It's definitely dark by 4:30 pm, giving us a grand total of 8 hours of daylight. But even then the sun never quite makes it's glorious presence known. There are all sorts of cozy wonders about the English winter, and believe me, lots of my time is spent focusing on them. Regardless of your location, the barebones fact is this: light deprivation sucks. Taking this into metaphor, I am hellbent on finding the opportunities to make too-many-dark-days-in-a-row-to-comprehend work for me, rather than against me.

I hope you will embrace these 16 ways to make winter wonder-full. They help me hang on to my shine, without the assistance of my beloved Sun.

And for those of you who can not relate to this post whatsoever ... I am so very happy for you ;)

1. Let it Be
The Number One rule about surviving the winter blues is Do Not Be Ashamed if you feel sad, disconnected, lethargic. Do Not Wallow in it either, but it is VERY important that you not beat yourself up. It is what it is. You can manage your feelings by joining forces with them, instead of separating yourself from your self and your feelings. Feelings are neither negative nor positive. They just are. It's how you handle yourself through your feelings that makes the difference!

2. Be Grateful
When there is sun? Worship it. Don't just let it be an afterthought, or something you take for granted. Soak it up. Talk to it. Let the sunshine beam it's healing rays onto your pale winter face. Thank it, then do a little sun-dance and beg it to come back again. Soon :)

3. Cozy Up and Quiet Down
Make the best of what warmth there is by drinking body warming tea, and wrap up in the coziest blanket you can find. Give yourself hushed quiet time, and as much as you need. I'm finally learning that it's okay that my soul requires lots of space and time spent staring at the walls in order to make it through life ... even if the rest of the world zooms by, and even if some people think it's not okay to just sit, breathe, and be. Giving this gift of quiet nothingness to myself is more nourishing on more deeply layered levels than words can say.

4. Call Out Your Inner-Winter-Creativity-Master-Diva!
Winter is the Goddess Persephone's frolicking time (you can read more about my love affair with her here.   Conjure up your deepest soul-diving energy, and use your abundant creative and exploratory powers to express your vastly rich soulscape through art, writing, poetry, photography, music, etc. USE your blues to guide you; you'll be amazed at your own courage in the depths. By the way? Poetry runs wild in the wintertime if you ask me. It's like the lack of sunshine releases oodles of words into the atmosphere that linger and dance in an endless symphony of syllable and soliloquy.

5. Love Yourself through the Holiday Blues
As mentioned above, for many the winter time = holiday time. The holidays can shine a light on deep feelings of loss or disconnection from family or friends. You are not alone if you feel immeasurable isolation (not to mention deep fatigue, avoidance, depression, or anger) when the holiday season comes marching along again. Exploring our feelings of loss, grief, loneliness, and disconnection should never, ever be avoided. Can you give yourself permission to feel these feelings without dwelling on the circumstances surrounding them? Can you give yourself permission to give to yourself the very thing you feel you are missing? Sure, you may not be able to heal that family relationship single-handedly, or bring back the one you love, but you CAN give yourself a gift of love and self-connection that can help you heal your own heart. Cuddle yourself under your own wing, and dare to find empowering ways to connect with yourself. As mentioned above, expressing your feelings in creative ways is powerful. You can feel them literally pouring out of you onto a tangible medium, so that you can look at your feelings, honor them, and learn to make peace with what is and who you are. These feelings can rise so determinedly to the surface at this time of year, and this is a gift that only you can give yourself ... even if, like me, you'd rather avoid these particular feelings like the dickens. You will feel greatly liberated by facing your feelings, embracing them, and allowing them to express.

Also, consider writing a list of all those who do shine beauty into your life by being present and loving. Better yet, write them a love letter :) And how about writing yourself a love letter? I know, I know ... kinda hard to do sometimes. Guaranteed, this list and letters will fill your heart and lift your spirits, and remind you that you are loved; a vital member of our Universe whose presence is necessary and much-loved.

6. Bundle Up and Face Winter Head On
Experience the poetry happening all around you by going for a walk in nature. Yes, it's true, winter is so incredibly beautiful. Notice those bare branches, how they silhouette against the sky. Notice the difference in light, how it's low position in the sky thickens your blood and you feel just a bit more primal inside. Can you find something beautiful in the hush of snowfall, the chill of wind, the way the streetlights light up an ominously dark afternoon in your neighborhood? Don't forget that even when there is absence of light ... there are still light-filled trees, grass, flowers, and oceans waiting to nurture our souls.

7. Curl up and R E A D!
There are billions of other worlds aka amazing books out there, so why don't you give yourself permission to cuddle up with one and get lost in it? Just a few of my faves:
Women Who Run With the Wolves, by Clarissa Pinkola Estes (reading this book is one of the best things you could ever do for yourself, and perfect for summoning creativity in the dark days of winter).
Oneness, by Oneness and Rasha
The Fifth Sacred Thing, by Starhawk.
The Year of the Flood, by Margaret Atwood.
Pope Joan, by Donna Woolfolk Cross
Conversations with God, 1-3 by Neale Donald Walsch
The History of Love, by Nicole Krauss.
Goddesses in Every Woman, by Jean Shinoda Bolen (an amazing book that will teach you all about my fave archetype and winter diva Persephone, as well as other empowering educational goddessy divas).

8. Nourish Your Body
Root vegetables and green smoothies make the winter go round in my world. Potatoes, beets, turnips, carrots, squash, are incredibly grounding and soothing during the short days of winter. Also VERY important is to ingest a great deal of greens to keep you stocked with vital nutrients and mood boosters. Green smoothies filled with chlorella, spirulina, barley grass and wheatgrass will infuse your bod with sunshine energy - even in it's absentia.

9. Soak in a Hot Bath
Load up on aromatic candles that nuzzle to your olfactory sense. Dazzle your eyeballs with the diffused light of candles that dances over the lush bubbles soothing your skin. Exfoliate those dry winter skin cells - and detoxify your body! - by indulging in a sugar or salt scrub while you soak. A divine ritual!

10. M E D I T A T E
.... and breathe. As modeled by our winter muse Persephone, winter is the ideal time for going-inside, not only creatively, but with the intention to feel around and get to know ourselves better. Meditation is the key that unlocks and liberates our deep-inside self. If you've ever meditated, you know that meditation does things inside that words don't describe. Sigh.

11. Let Music Soar and Restore Your Soul
Music can lead us into amazing places within, which is why we love it so. And there is something extra surreal and otherworldly in the winter, right? Listening to music that conjures inner surreal stillness is a terrific way to run toward the intensity of our winter feelings, rather than running away. Have you ever listened to Sigur Ros on a shivering winters day? Or Jonathon Goldman's Holy Harmony as the sun is setting already, sending high-contrast beams of light to cast long shadows across the landscape?

12. Be Touched
We all know there is healing power in the sensory gift of touch. To receive a massage, energy healing, facial, pedicure, or any other sort of treatment involving healing touch is incredibly grounding. It will provide a space for you to feel firmly rooted in your body, restoring your balance, inner peace, and help you maintain your stillpoint. Yes, the healing power of touch is just what you need to help you through the doldrums.

13. Get A Reading
Sometimes when we feel we've lost our way, a reading from a trusted or recommended intuitive can help us recalibrate and align with our truth. If this isn't your thing, a heart-to-heart chat with a BFF or counselor or therapist can have the same effect - gently guiding you back into the sacred and authentic YOU. Regardless of the form, guidance is a healthy way to connect with yourself, so long as you still listen to your own heart above all others.

15. Wear Bright Colors!
When winter is feeling particularly grey and endless, do yourself a huge favor and wear the brightest colors in your closet. When your senses are stimulated by bright colors or sparkling embellishments, your mood automatically lifts, and a little spring will kick into our step. Mission Higher Vibration accomplished!

16. Go Surfing
Nourish your soul by taking time to surf through inspiring blogs and sites filled with information that will tickle your chakras and remind you of the highest truths. Expect Wonderful, The Peaceful Journey, Goddess Guidebook, Lynne Hoppe, Soul Aperture, and Spirit Library are a smattering of my faves. (Or .... maybe it's time you start your own blog?! You know who you are!)

And if you are having a really horrifically awfully dark non-sparkle-whatsoever kind of day? What if you did every single thing on the list, all in one day? Holy moly .... do you think that's even possible? I might have to take my own advice and try that out. Sounds like a major healing humdinger sort of day ... just the sort I like :)

my unconquerable soul

2010-12-07T10:49:00.000-08:00

I re-stumbled across this poem today, and it gave me chiiiiiiills. No, it isn't the winter air that got to me, it is the utter inspiration of these words. We've all heard this poem, but how about giving it another look-see? Though it is a bit focused on the depths of darkness, I find the message to be quite relevant to how many of us have been feeling through some, shall we say, trying times. How it CELEBRATES the strength of the soul, and HONORS the courage it takes to overcome? And how it underscores that it matters not whatever shall come, as long as we are true to ourselves.
Think about it ~ haven't you been unconquerable through your trying times?

How about giving yourself a pat on the back and a kiss on the smackers for being YOU?
Unconquerable! Unbowed! Unafraid!

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

~by William Ernest Henley

This poem reminds me of how super strong I am, how I always make it through the tough bits, and how I am Captain In-Charge-Of-My-Own-Life-Thank-You-Very-Much ... which brought my stream of consciousness to this:

Have you watched Dead Poets Society lately? The message in this movie is enough to inspire me to run around screaming 'carpe diem' and pumping my fist into the air like any good liberated soul would. This is just the final scene in case you only have 5 minutes to feed your soul today, and just in case you needed more goosebumps and reminders of the absolute necessity of being who you are no matter how many mean headmasters are lurking around you ~ trying to intimidate you into staying small, controlled and obedient to what they think your world should look like. After you watch, I dare you to jump on top of the nearest piece of furniture (preferably one that places you straight in front of a mirror so you can see your beautiful self) and scream 'oh captain, my captain!' at the top of your lungs.

i dare you to love yourself

2010-11-29T09:09:00.000-08:00

Yep, I dare you to love yourself.

Aren't you ready to live freely, truly, madly, deeply? In a deep-diving sort of way? Honestly, authentically, wholeheartedly taking yourself by the hand as you walk through your very own life? Embracing all parts of yourself? ALL of you? I dare you. I know, I know (trust me, I know) ... it isn't always easy. Sometimes it's far too tempting to fall into a hole and wallow in it ... to despair the this's and that's ... the who's and the when's. When that temptation arises to beat yourself up or throw in the towel, can you dare make the conscious decision to love yourself instead? To sit down with yourself and look yourself in the eye? To have a conversation with yourself, come what may? I don't know about you, but in my experience there are a few big giveaways signaling a potential possibility that I might veer off into the land of disconnection with my very own self. Here are a smattering of examples:

The doldrums begin to hit. You feel frozen. Nothing makes sense. You feel dead inside. Your anxiety begins it's first frenzied fluttering. Your anger begins to stoke it's own fire rearing it's head so that it can point it's fiery fingers at everyone else. It's their fault. The quiver in your chin is tethered to a feeling of unworthiness, helplessness, victim-ness ... that hole begins to appear, and you are longing to jump in ... headfirst ... with all your clothes on. Who cares anyway, you ask yourself.

But wait! Here's your opportunity to make a NEW choice ... one that won't leave you swimming in the dark, thrashing about in your own thorns, burning in the nowhere Land of Blamegame, feeling more alone than ever, with a new sob story to wail to anyone who will listen.

Can you remove those options ... and simply love yourself? Take a deep breath, fall into your heart, close your eyes, and ask yourself:

'What do you need right now? I want to know, because I love you. I do. I really really love you.'

Then listen to the answer. That's right. LISTEN to what your self is trying to tell you. In my experience, the upsets and the anxiety that I can feel do not come from the outside world ... but my own inability to 1) connect with, and 2) LISTEN to ME.

So the answer coming back might sound something like: 'I'm afraid. I can't breathe. I don't feel like I can do (fill in the blank). Nobody understands me. Why can't I find love? Why don't people listen to me? I feel angry because I think I don't have a choice and I must (fill in the blank). I am alone. I want to scream. I want to cry. I want to stop. I need space.'

And then ... what if you let yourself have those feelings instead of yelling at, ignoring, or judging your self (which only perpetuates the above issues, by the way) and actually speak to those feelings? Those tender places inside of you that can educate, inform, heal and transform you? With all of you present, open, curious, and ready to do something really really wonderful?

And then, what if you actually gave yourself what you need?!?!?

'Oh, you are afraid? Ohhhh I know you are afraid. It's okay to feel afraid. Do you want to talk about what you are afraid of? What will help you find courage? Ohhhh you want to just sit still for a moment and not think? Okay. Let's just sit here for a moment. Okay, now you would like a hot bath? Let's make sure that happens.'

'I know you feel alone. It's okay to have those feelings. Ohhhh and you feel like nobody listens to you? What do you need to say? I'm listening to you. Ohhhhhhhhhhh ... you say I haven't been listening to you either? I'm so sorry. I'm listening to you now. Tell me everything ~ you are worth my time and attention.'

That's right, people. Loving yourself starts here. Inner dialoguing is not new-age airy-fairy coddling. It's an honoring of your deepest truest self by taking time to understand who you are in conversation, giving yourself the same treatment you would your oldest, dearest friend. (If you are uncomfortable with this, or feeling a bit cynical today - this is not for everyone. But you can still find ways to be nice to yourself!)

When I slow myself down out of my patterns of upset, I experience a tangible sensation of rooted calm spread through me. I feel myself coming back into myself, rather than a shrieking scatter of panic energy rippling out into the world. I used to live my entire life from that scattered panic ~ can you imagine what sort of world that created for me?! My experiences were a direct reflection of that energy, and fed many reasons to panic right back to me in an ever escalating cyclone of external seeking and then a reaction to that seeking in panic (because it wasn't really what I wanted OR needed but because I didn't love myself or connect to myself I never had any real idea of what I wanted or needed OR deserved), I was locked in a never~ending backlash spiral of panic, shriek, disappoint, blame, shriek and panic again. I was a whirling banshee of What's Going On and Why Does My Life Suck and Who Can I Blame For It.

I love myself now. That's the difference between Me now, and Me then. Now I let myself be who I actually am, instead of covering it because I'm afraid or disconnected or too panicked to know which end is up. Covering up only adds layers of confusing stagnation to peel back, and hurts us exponentially every minute of our days. I've learned that the ONLY thing that helps me navigate the world is to anchor within and know MY truth and love MY self. When I do that? I'm happy. Calm. Grounded. Make good decisions. Know what is best for me. Love those around me better. Therefore, the world around me reflects that back to me.

Bye bye panic!

Hasta la vista shrieking!

Syonara trying-to-make-people-love-me-by-doing-what-I-think-will-make-them-happy-but-somehow-only-disappointing-them-and-myself-in-the-end!

Hellllllooooo peace and quiet, soul wisdom and me-ness. Doesn't that make sense?

If we live in our own self, anchored in our own light, and spend our time LOVING OURSELVES in a quiet dialogue with the intention of making good choices, shining our inner radiance and unconditional love out into the world, and being the very best human being we can be ... it's a win-win.

You don't have to wait until you are in a pit of despair to love on yourself. You can take time every day to commune with your thoughts, actions, accomplishments, desires, and emotions. As in:

'Wow you are really nailing this compassionate thing down! ... didn't it feel great to listen to so-and-so and offer support when they needed it?'

'Holy crap you are looking so gorgeous today ... look at the shine in your eyes!'

'Well done choosing to eat salad instead of mac and cheese ... you know it makes you feel so much better!'

'Fantastic idea to eat the mac and cheese instead of the salad ... you really needed that cozy treat!'

Think about this: how terrific do you feel when you are recognized, when someone really sees who you are? Your boss, employee, friend, lover, your pet? Imagine what it would feel like to give yourself that recognition, every day? Dare to love yourself silly! You can do this! The point is that every day you know who you are and what you need, so that you are in connection with yourself through all experiences ~ and can navigate life from the heart of your soul. Capiche?

Oh, and when you don't want to love yourself? When you hate everything about you? When there is absolutely no reason for you to even exist, or to promote your artwork, or to write that novel, take that class, get out of bed, or ask for that raise? That's when you actually need your own love most of all. Even if you have to drag yourself kicking and screaming to er, um ... yourself. Try it. I double dare you. You aren't going to get this sort of deep, nurturing, problem-solving, creativity skyrocketing, honesty-pouring-out-of-every-pore-in-your-body lovin' from anyone but you ~ EVER.

Trust me. I know.

hello, it's me again ...

2010-11-22T08:25:00.000-08:00

Wowsers, long time no write ...

I've been cocooning and recalibrating in the most quieted splendid ways ... (and going to hell and back a few times) ... all the while strengthening my wings and my inner Persephone ... and my need to be free ... AND my need to be ME!

The result of all this cocoony-hell-and-back behavior has been a sturdy gestation steeped in need to reveal the truest, purest version of me ... which is of course an ongoing process ... but this latest hibernation was perhaps a record, even for me! I've missed blogging ever so much, and look forward to reconnecting with every last one of you.

At this very moment I am re-working my blog to suit my emerging-from-the-world-of-incubation self, and shall be revealing all in the coming weeks!

Please drop me a note and say HI!

I've really missed you. :)

persephone, my queen

2010-08-31T07:10:00.000-07:00

Today I am conjuring the myth of Persephone, ancient queen of the Underworld. Persephone was the overly sheltered offspring of Demeter and Zeus. One day, while frolicking in flowery fields with the nymphs, she was quite suddenly kidnapped by Hades, fierce god of the Underworld, and dragged to his lair. After much hullabaloo on the part of her mother, who rallied all the other gods and goddesses against Hades, Persephone was freed. However, prior to her release, crafty Hades tricked her into eating magic pomegranate seeds which forced her return to the Underworld for a season each year, where she ruled with him as half-prisoner, half-Queen. And so the seasons were born. Winter marks Persephone’s descent into the Underworld, with the shortening of days and the death of vegetation. She then rises to the Upperworld in the spring, and the earth celebrates. Blooms abound and the sun extends it’s daily romp in the sky. (For a thorough description of the myth go to: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Persephone).

My love affair with Persephone is not just about the surface story of her seduction into the darkness by the clever Hades. She comes to life when I dive beneath that, in typical Persephonic fashion, to the energy and symbolism, to the guidance and illumination of this Underworld Queen. Persephone teaches me about duality, surrender, and holding space for myself even when blinded by my own darkness, or stumbling about in a subconscious maze of self-sabotauge. She models authenticity, courage, and how to transition gracefully between Shadow and Light.

I understand the universality of her fragility, and that it is precisely her delicacy which is her power. If there is a world between the Underworld and the Upperworld, this is it: the landscape of vulnerability that sits in the transition. Skillfully navigating this transition is the jewel in her crown. It is what the archetype of Persephone herself embodies as she glistens and glides from world to world. Opera with the angels or bellows with the beasts of hell, she does not identify solely with either end of the spectrum because she has integrated the opposites within her. She does not know blindness in darkness. She does not know deafness in thunder.

In my minds eye, she is a shimmering slither of a shadow, a lithe and nimble shapeshifter of grace, dignity, and authority. I see a woman-child with soft budding breasts made of blossom, and tendrils of hissing shadow crowning her head. I hear a cackle and a giggle, I feel her vulnerability and her strength, and in my veins I carry the pulse of Persephone who chose to rise above victim status in order to gain her crown as Queen.

cocooning

2010-08-07T06:04:00.000-07:00

feelin' quiet ...

and a little bit (or alot) cocoon-y.

lots of change

lots of stillness

lots of me just wanting to quietly be me.

rearranging

recalibrating

excavating

celebrating

and cocooning until my butterfly decides it's time to fly.

landslide ...

2010-07-28T02:03:00.000-07:00

shedding a few tears watching these angels sing.

they are the kind of tears that are both happy and sad ...

that reflect slices of life through eyes and heart that have seen and felt it all ...

that well up from a weary warrior soul who is also the child, the innocence, the purity, the light.

ahhhhh, here's to the pinprick of tenderness we all carry deep inside ...

these kids from PS 22 in NYC are remarkable ...
(all children are remarkable) ...

and this song is my song for deep sighing moments of all-knowing far-reaching wisdom, patience, resilience, and the tenacity of surviving endless attempts to reach the top of the mountain ...

if you ask me, i will tell you ...

2010-07-26T03:59:00.000-07:00

... i am made up of words and stars, beams of light and scars ...

(created this morning after being pulled into my studio by murmurings and whisperings
of creative sparks swirling ... waiting to be caught, refined, caressed, and expressed.)

art and soul

2010-07-18T00:12:00.000-07:00

oh, the delicious joy of creativity ... deep sigh for quiet time spent in creating from my soul.

'every artist dips his brush in his own soul, and paints his own nature into his pictures.'
~ henry ward beecher

interview with ☆ divine harmony ☆

2010-07-08T12:29:00.000-07:00

The first time I ever made sense to myself was inside the words of an astrologer/intuitive/mystic on the Upper West Side in New York City, who translated the Erin she read in the stars with a graceful mix of poetry, soul, and logic. Always one to find meaning in the esoteric, I began a journey into understanding myself through spiritual studies because of that reading. Now, 15 years later, I seek meaning in the heavens to add a dollop of star poetry on top of what I know to be true inside of my own self, and I've come to believe that the patterns above mirror the patterns below (and the same applies to self with other) and vice versa. Always seeking grounded teachers, star-readers, and messengers as I continue to make sense of this human life I am living, it was my extreme pleasure to meet astrologer and psychologist Divine Harmony, and consequently, to share this fascinating and enlightening interview with my readers.

Divine Harmony came into my life many moons ago and began to echo that poetry of stars read to me so long ago in NYC - but with her own twist. There is logic and there is soul in the translations of the heavens and the human heights and depths that Divine Harmony gives to so many of us on her blog and through her Facebook updates (on FB alone she has 3,590 'likes' or 'fans'). Intense and to the point, Divine doesn't mess around when it comes to talking about ego, divine potential, shadow, and light - which is exactly what I love about her beautiful blend of astrology / psychology. Her blog posting on the eclipses and Grand Cross aspects in this super duper astrology summer of 2010 is a must-read along with another recent post on karmic quickening, so be sure to visit those links after you read the interview. :) I highly recommend adding yourself to her FB page, so that you can receive her highly intelligent, and deeply soulful updates on what the heck is happening up there and what the heck you can do about it down here ... and most importantly, deep down inside yourself. These astrological / psychological energy reads are the best kind of star translations, because Divine Harmony guides you into you - encouraging you to harness your inner power through the wisdom of the heavens above, the earth below, and the you that is your own Universe intersecting between them.

E: Okay, I'm going to start with the most obvious question :) Can you explain how the placement of stars and rotation of planets affect our psyche, path and potential?

DH: the way that i see the cosmos- as do most mystics- is akin to the hermetic maxim 'as above, so below'. so what goes on up there/out there in the Universe has a direct impact on what goes on down here. but the reverse is also true :) it's not that the stars impact and control us- we mutually impact each other. if you see everything in the Universe as One- then you can understand that what happens in any part of the Universe- in the sky or on earth- will influence any other part of the Universe. to me astrology is about learning to tune into the cycles of nature and life. it helps us to see the link between the cosmos and us- and to me that is the key to consciousness as well as healing the planet. i view astrology as a tool for Self-consciousness- a mean to connect to the Self (capital S Self is akin to the Higher Self, whereas little s self is the ego).

ancient astrological illustration

E: Where does astrology come from? Who were the earliest star readers?
DH: astrology is a very ancient art. the jury is out as to when it started- but what that is based on is ancient texts that made it through the ages. i personally think that even prior to what is recorded as the written word astrology was likely around. and then there are those who say the advanced language of astrology was actually brought to earth by beings from highly advanced star systems (i.e. aliens)- and if you are going by that then you could probably call astrology timeless.

ancient astrological illustration

E: Do you remember the first time you felt the pull of the heavens? What was it like for you? Did you know you would become a reader of the stars at that moment?

DH: upon hearing this question a couple things stand out for me. the first is when i was in grade school and my mom took me to the doctor to get glasses. my teacher told on me that i couldn't see the board and i was not happy! i didn't want to wear glasses :( but after the appointment when we got the glasses and drove back home it was night time and i look up at the sky and gasped and told my mom 'wow there are so many stars up there!' my mom was horrified to find out i really couldn't see that well all this time. i, on the other hand, was in awe of the night sky. i always get that same feeling of awe every time i look up. it's like i am looking at the stars for the first time every time :) the second instance is in college when i first found astrology. i was raised born again christian so a lot of things did not make it into my childhood experience. but in college they did! i read my first vogue then and i saw the horoscope section. i read mine and it totally resonated! and i was hooked. over the coming years i began eating up any book i could on astrology and friends would buy me astrology things for presents. 14 years later i still have that same passion for astrology. it's one of the only things in my life that i have stuck with for this long that says a lot ;)

E: Your blog header says "astrology through the eyes of a depth and transpersonal psychologist (they may seem opposite but they are two sides to the same coin)." How do these seemingly different paths of study relate to one another?
DH: depth psychology is all about the depths of the Soul. one goes into the depths, the shadows, the interior of life. transpersonal psychology is more transcendent in nature. it is about rising above, seeing things from a higher perspective and it tends to be more spiritual (versus soulful). to me these two types of psychology are like two sides to the same coin. if you are always wallowing in the depths without taking time to rise above then you can get stuck in them. alternatively if you are always rising above and are afraid to go into the dark and explore you will be ungrounded and unembodied. they both need to be there to balance each other out. when i was looking into grad school i had applied to and gotten into two schools- one that was more depth and one that more transpersonal. i ultimately choose the depth school because most all my life i had lived the transpersonal level but it was the deeper aspects of the Soul i wanted to explore. i choose well as my school (pacifica graduate institute) helped to lead me on the path i am on now :)

E: It is a fascinating trio: astrology, depth psychology and transpersonal psychology. If I am correct in my understanding of the core concepts, they are respectively: the study of the Universe that surrounds us, our Unconscious mind, and spiritual self-transcendence. What a massively potent recipe! What was your path to deciding to throw them all in the pot together?
DH: yeah it is a interesting combination ;) i honestly don't know how i came to bring them together. i think the Universe did that and i just went along. i began to see a split in the spiritual community around between Spirit and Soul, Light and Shadow. a lot of spiritual people seem to think life is all about living Love, Light and Bliss. but from the depth perspective this is unintegrated and does not lead to wholeness. but on the other end i saw a lot of depth people make comments about the transpersonal realms being flaky, ungrounded and empty. both sides seemed to think the other was lacking. what i think they both were lacking was integration and respect for the other side of the coin. you cannot have wholeness without yin and yang. to me astrology is a means to be able to integrate both.

E: Does a person's natal chart lay out a map of possibilities, or a map of destiny? In other words, do we make our charts, or do our charts make us?
DH: i believe that the Soul chooses things- so the Soul makes the chart. from the ego's perspective it can feel like fate, or that the chart makes us. it's all about the perspective you are coming from. the whole point to enlightenment is to align the little self with the Higher Self so that they are working together- not at odds with each other. when this happens you see that you choose your chart AND your chart choose you. another thing to note is that the Soul does not see things as good or bad- the Soul only focuses on growth. so if you grow through a positive experience- like a marriage or having a baby- or a negative one- like an accident or lose of someone or something important to you- it doesn't matter to the Soul. it does to the ego though- and the latter will often feel like a death. if the ego thinks it is the one in control- then certain chart aspects or transits to the natal chart that are more 'negative' in potential can be experienced as cruel fate. but if the Higher Self is perceiving it then all is working for the same goal.

ancient astrological illustration

E: Ultimately, are astrology and psychology to be used as a tool for us to see our ultimate potential and growth opportunities -- not as a prop or crutch which we use to identify with our wounds and have an excuse for why we are how we are?
DH: yes! i think being able to see wounds and our proclivities to being certain ways is great- and often it is hard to see ourselves without a mirror present. that is why relationships are such fertile ground for growth! but divination type things like astrology, tarot, and dreams can also work like mirrors. i can step back and see myself in my chart and it can act as a mirror for me. if you use astrology or other divination tools as such it can be very illuminating. but if you get stuck in what you see and use it as an excuse then you have taken a positive tool and turned it into something negative. ultimately things/concepts/ideas aren't good or bad- it's how we use them. it is this way with money, power, sex, and astrology. it all comes down to what we choose to do with them.

E: How do we resolve issues we are born into, and how can the information astrologers share with us help us do so? (For example, I was born under the Scorpio full moon, and I was born 6 minutes away from having Scorpio rising ... for starters! How can I utilize the information available to me about this internal opposition to heal the split that it creates?)
DH: astrology can help us do deep inner work by first bringing consciousness to parts of us that we may not have realized were there or did not know how to identify. then from a conscious place we can choose to do that deep inner work (again it's a choice- some people see the stuff in their charts and then do nothing about them!). using your chart as an example- an opposition implies a need for integration. it's a relationship aspect- one thing is opposite another- like a yin/yang. when they oppose eachother there can be a tendency to identify with one and project the other, particularly when younger. doing deep Soul work helps to integrate- and this often coincides with transits that activate the opposition. for example pluto, the ruling planet of scorpio, just entered capricorn in april 2008. capricorn is sextile to scorpio- so pluto was harmoniously aspecting your ascendant around 2007-2008 (approximately). pluto transits bring massive transformation, regeneration and rebirth. with a natal sun/moon opposition with the moon in scorpio, pluto themes will be important things for you to deal with in life and will often play out in relationships. themes around power, control, depth, intimacy, vulnerability, change, and Soul transformation are all highlighted with pluto's aspect to your ascendant these themes were likely activated and a deeper process of integration began. when pluto sextiles your moon (which i don't know when that will be cause i don't have your chart info) he will also trine your sun and this will be another chapter in your Soul transformation journey. utilizing the information to do healing work takes astrological knowledge (either your own or an astrologers) and then a desire to integrate it and/or make use of it. in my readings, writing and horoscopes i always try to point out the options people have with how to work with energies in their charts. ultimately the 'tougher' aspects actually create more growth because they create conflict and a need to resolve it. more harmonious aspects may be more lucky and easy- but sometimes they are so easy that people don't make use of the gifts that are there. bottom line i think how astrology helps us to heal/grow is by bringing consciousness to our whole selves (little self and big Self). and that is the first step to doing any deep Soul work.

© erin faith allen

E: You have such a unique viewpoint - the paths carved by the planets and stars, and through psychology acting as a sort of barometer of the collective consciousness. Do you believe a blissful future is possible for this planet?
DH: ha! i love this question :) because i view things through both a depth lens and a transpersonal one- i think that we have the potential to have bliss but also to have darkness. i don't think some magic wand will be waved and everyone on the planet will wake up and ascend. i think this takes work- deep Soul work as well as Spirit work. and most people, unfortunately, don't want to work that hard. the way a lot of change on the planet happens is when negative things happen that wake people up to the instability and insecurity of life. the ego likes to go on thinking all is great and it is in control. but for the spiritual path we need to realize there is something Higher that is leading us. oftentimes it takes drastic measures to get people to acknowledge this. i think true bliss is living from an open heart no matter what is going on outside/around us. there has been a massive awakening that has been going on in the recent years- and the influx of energies on this planet from the Universe at large are what supports that. i think we are at a major turning point and that anyone alive right now on this planet signed up to be here at this time. so do i think a blissful future is possible? yes! but i don't think the path to bliss is easy or comfortable. and i think having the whole planet get on board will take a lot of people standing up and walking their talk. more people need to do this- but they are every day. we will see what the future holds :)

portal of the exalted wings
© mykal aubry / www.mykalaubry.com

E: Have you done a chart around the big date looming in our future: Dec 21, 2012? If so, what can you tell us about your impressions?
DH: yes i have done the chart and checked it out. i am on a fence. i really don't think we can predict with accuracy what is going to happen- and i think a lot of people's predictions are thought projections that if given enough energy will actually come into being- so we need to be careful what we think! as i mentioned above- some people think all the 'good people' are going to ascend literally into the air and be carried off somewhere else, while all the 'bad people' will stay down here and kill each other off. i don't agree with this. first of all i think there is something hierarchical about that- and second of all a true bodhisattva would not abandon the less conscious people so they could go off and live in bliss. we need those highly evolved beings to stay on this planet and help the others to wake up. to me this vision is an example of the split between light and shadow. the good people go up/into the light, the bad people stay down here/in the dark. i don't think so. to me the ascension also involves descension of Spirit fully into body. the point is integration, not separation. i do know that as 2012 approaches the energies are getting more and more intense! it really is an amazing time to be alive right now. some say full disclosure about alien races will occur in the coming years- i think that is definitely probable. i look forward to that day! i do know that humans have a tendency to catastrophize and make things out to be bigger than they are- larger than life like a movie. i am wary of anyone who says they have the answers about 2012. i think anyone truly tuned in knows there are many possible outcomes that all depend on the choices we make as humans between now and 12/21/2012. each decision we make can alter our future path. so i say start today by making conscious choices- personally and collectively. of course we need more conscious people running the decision making entities in the world- but that is another topic ;) ultimately anything is possible.

nine © mykal aubry / www.mykalaubry.com

E: Your passion for bringing the Dark Feminine into the collective consciousness resonates with me, and I was so thrilled to discover your Facebook group on the subject. Can you share with us your understanding of what the Dark Feminine is?
DH: yes i am very passionate about the dark feminine! my understanding of her is thus: we have Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine- they are two halves that make a whole. but often one is seen as light (masculine) and the other dark (feminine)- and i see them as containing both. so there is dark feminine and light feminine, dark masculine and light masculine. in the feminine polarity her light aspects have been predominately what patriarchal consciousness has deemed as worthy. light feminine qualities are mothering, nurturing, self-sacrificing, pure, chaste, virginal, innocent, etc... it is the dark feminine that has been demonized, repressed and seen as evil. the dark feminine qualities are powerful, intense, mysterious, magical, intuitive, fully connected to her body and her sexuality. these DF qualities (DF is short for dark feminine) are often feared in women and men who possess them (men also have DF energy!). dark does not mean bad- dark just means that which is not light, or that which is not rational/logical/linear. there has been a split between polarities for ages- dark and light, Soul and Spirit, body and mind, feminine and masculine, lower and higher, within and without. yet separation between the two is what causes fragmentation. they are meant to join in Union to create wholeness. in my opinion the DF is key to the whole conversation about the return of the Divine Feminine. the fierce kali-like energy of the DF needs to be brought back into the balance of things. unfortunately the DF is the enemy of ego because her gifts essentially trump the ego and make it realize it is not truly in control. since patriarchy is largely based on ego (and dominance) the DF has not been embraced. all parts of the quaternity need to be brought into balance- light and dark masculine, light and dark feminine- but i believe it is the DF that has been most disconnected from and as such is the one that most of the healing and balancing work should start with.

© erin faith allen

E: Can you please tell us why you are so passionate about this topic? How can we access our inner Dark Feminine, and why is it important we do so?
DH: i am passionate about this topic because her archetype lives within me. in astrology there are indicators you can look at that point to DF energy and i have all of them prominently placed. when transiting uranus activated several of these indicators back in 2003-2004 i began waking up to the DF in my life. when pluto began opposing them in 2008 i began to research and write about her. it is important to access/become conscious of the DF because she is a part of the lived experience. in order to attain enlightenment we need to be whole. when the DF is removed from consciousness there is a vital piece of wholeness that is repressed/demonized/put into the unconscious. connecting with her can come through many forms- dreams, body work, tantra, nature. the DF is all around us- and within us- but many do not even realize it! interestingly- my group 'healing the wounded dark feminine' on facebook just got removed for being obscene/hateful or inappropriate! i am not sure what happened- as the group has been up for almost a year. and the only thing the group challenges is the ego ;) it is actually quite symbolic that network site that is run by a corporation choose to delete my group- it's precisely what the egopatriarchal consciousness has tried to do to the DF for millenia- get rid of her! i think someone must have been offended by the topic and then reported the group- but it kind of sucks that there is no process of investigating before they just delete it. now there is no way to get it reinstated and all the 100+ posts and 2000 members have been erased. but that cannot keep the dark feminine out of consciousness ;)

© erin faith allen

E: How has your awareness of the Dark Feminine helped you navigate on your path?
DH: understanding the DF made sense of my entire life. the gifts i was born with that others couldn't understand began to take on more importance. i have always been very deep and very intense. i have not had much of an issue embodying my DF energy but when i was younger i had issues with how people responded to it in me. learning to own this energy and realize that other people's perception of it in me has more to do with their own relationship to their DF than it has to do with me has been quite a healing journey. the DF is a powerful archetype and when you have it but don't know it or don't know what to do with it it can get repressed or disconnected from- and that can lead to illness, unexpressed rage, depression and victimization. the empowered feminine is ancient archetype but it has been controlled by patriarchal consciousness for millenia. the DF path requires owning our power- but also acknowledging our shadow. the relationship to power is a huge thing. it's not about engaging in power/over, power/under dynamics. it's about being self-empowered. when DF is unintegrated people who possess her energy can often be full of rage and anger at being repressed- and essentially acting out in reaction to previous victimization. i think processing this rage is important- but staying in the rage is toxic. going to the source, healing the wound, and letting go of the past is all required for ultimate integration of the dark feminine. i am on this path now- and i will be for my entire life. the DF is a calling- she calls to you in your dreams, intuitions, in your art. more and more people are feeling her call to them and that is great. when i started my group on facebook it began with a couple members and now we have 1700! more people are interested in learning about her and connecting with her. each person who does this work helps to redress the balance of masculine and feminine, light and dark in the world. again- we live in exciting times :)

© carl jung, from the red book

E: Is it possible to use astrology as a guidebook to help us access and heal the Dark Feminine? If so, how?
DH: yes! as i said before- there are many indicators in the chart that point to the dark feminine. when i do readings with people who these indicators show up prominently i know that they have been led to me for a very specific reason. for example, i did a reading for a woman the other day who had TONS of DF in her chart- but she had never heard of the dark feminine! when i began to explain who she was something clicked inside of her. she said it all resonated she just didn't have the languaging to label it. sometimes labels can be limiting but other times they can actually be liberating- especially when something you've always felt but didn't know what to call now has a name. in astrology i can look at the DF indicators and then see the DF story- of both her gifts and her wounds- in the clients chart and help them to understand them. consciousness and understanding of this part of the self is the first step in accessing and healing any DF wounds within.

© erin faith allen

E: Lately I've been seeing the asteroids Lillith and Persephone mentioned constantly by astrologers - are they related archetypally to the Dark Feminine? Can we access their myths to help us access our personal mythology and healing?
DH: yes those are two of the indicators i look at in astrology- i look at black moon lilith, dark moon lilith and asteroid lilith (the three liliths). i also look at algol- the dark feminine fixed star. persephone, eris, and medusa are also often used. their myths are what inform these placements- but you have to investigate the myth! a lot of myths were created by/told by patriarchal people. for example- the medusa story is often told as a scary monster woman with snakes coming out of her head that a male hero slayed in order to save the day. but there are other interpretations of this myth. for example if you see medusa as the DF and the male hero as the ego (the ego often thinks it is the hero of the day!) we can see why there was conflict between the two. and snakes are ancient symbols of the Goddess and of wisdom. medusa was actually an ancient symbol of the Goddess and at the time of this patriarchal telling of the story- the Goddess culture was being taken over by patriarchal culture. so they twisted the story to make it a slaying of the Goddess- symbolic of the shift in power from feminine to masculine. in addition medusa was said to have an eye that could turn man to stone. well the DF does the same thing to ego. medusa's eye turned ego to stone- because she saw beyond the surface to what was really there. the ego likes to think it is all that is there- but if you know the depth image of the iceberg and how the tip that is showing above water is the ego, but the huge part below is the unconscious then you know that there is a lot more existence than what the ego perceives. this is part of medusa's story. many of these myths that demonize women- particularly women who were DF in nature (i.e. powerful, magical, fierce) were created or altered by men. looking into the history of the myth is important.

E: Is there any one planet or constellation that you feel most connected with? If so, what is your connection and how does it affect you?
DH: i feel very connected to sirius- a fixed star that is found in tropical cancer (approximately 14-15 degrees cancer). sirius is a fixed star that many ancient cultures have myths about. most all of them have a similar theme about this star being the home of highly evolved beings who have been/are trying to help our planet to evolve and raise it's consciousness. it's a start that is associated with making the mundane sacred- and to me it is very mystical. it was the first star in the sky i noticed and was drawn to again and again. i have is significantly placed in my chart and i feel a deep affinity for it :)

E: Do you have any feelings about NASA's moon bombing last year? Do you think something of this magnitude ripples into our astrological experiences and our collective consciousness?
DH: yes i do and i wrote a blog about it! i felt it was symbolic of the masculine's dominant nature- the sense that we can just bomb and take over whatever we want. and the fact that the moon is a symbol of the feminine cannot be ignored. to me this was the height of stupidity- much like the oil drilling in the gulf of mexico. people just do what they want until something bad happens and then it may be too late to undo it or fix it. we are lucky nothing crazy happened with the moon bombing- but what if something did? on another note- i think there was/is a lot of coverup involving the moon and that expedition. the way it was viewed on tv- something seemed amiss. there are all kinds of conspiracy theories around the moon having bases on it by humans as well as other beings from other planets. this may seem out there to some- but to others it is not. i personally believe there is a lot that our government or NASA does not tell us. and i definitely feel this about the moon-bombing.

E: Does everything that happens in the heavens affect us as much as everything that has happened in our personal history (ie childhood, family etc)? We've just talked about the moon bombing, but what about solar flares, meteor showers, asteroids, and comets?
DH: i think all things have an impact. it's hard to tell which informs which. is there a massive shift happening in the collective- and then the solar flares start up? or do the solar flares start up and then create a shift in the collective? i don't know- perhaps both. i do know that when comets appear they often coincide with significant events. and the moon bombing totally connected to what was going on astrologically at that time- as well as the whole masculine/feminine split in the collective. i think things that happen in our personal history are informed by what goes on in the rest of the world- just as much as what goes on in the rest of the world is informed by our personal history. i think they impact each other. it doesn't feel right to me to say that one dominates the other. obviously our personal history will be experienced more personally- whereas collective events will be felt worldwide. but as one of my favorite astrologers, eric francis, says- the personal is political, and vice versa. i see individuals as cells and the planet as the organism. what happens to one or the other will affect or impact both. there is no separation.

E: Are you available for private sessions and readings? If so, how may those interested contact you?
DH: yes i am :) check out my website www.divineharmony.org and email me at divineharmony@me.com to set something up :)

love and gratitude to Mykal Aubry, Carlos Gotay Martinez and Carl Jung for sharing their artistry to illustrate this interview :)

Green Planet, by Carlos Gotay Martinez